And then Al Franken absolutely nailed him for lying and embellishing his record. It was beautiful.

Holy shit.

I am so sorry about your cat. That is the worst thing ever. Losing pets is so unbelievably hard.

I cackled. Because I am also old.

Good lord, that dog’s eyes are screaming for help.

It’s finally winter in the midwest, so I made a fucking baller chili. I expect to eat it for at least three more days. Yay!

I was that wife five years ago. I had done everything I knew to do to signal my unhappiness in our relationship, but he never understood/acknowledged it. He just kept telling me I was the kind of person who was incapable of being happy, that he was a great husband to me, and no, he absolutely would not go to…

This is my neighborhood Michaels. I was there probably an hour before this happened, buying a tart pan. The folks who work here are usually super nice and at least moderately helpful. Man, I just wanted to punch this crazy bitch right in the throat.

Hi neighbor! I was just at that Michaels last Wednesday . I’m super bummed out I missed this, although I probably wouldhave busted her in the mouth.