I just bought the plane tickets for my boyfriend and I to elope. Like five minutes ago. I’m going to surprise him. It’s going to be the weekend before Halloween in Colorado. My family is going to be bummed at first, that there won’t be a ‘real’ wedding (in their opinion) but I know he’ll enjoy this more.

My dad usually tries to wash and reuse his.

My dad usually tries to wash and reuse his.

To be fair, I wouldn’t even put my face on a freshly unboxed one.

As someone who’s mother looked the other way on multiple occasions, and is now old enough to look back and recognize it, yes it’s strange and frustrating. I’m not sure that I’ll let my kids ever spend a lot of time with her (if I ever have any) just because I can’t trust her judgement when it comes to who is safe to…

I think (hindsight and all) the it would have benefit me more to have moved in with my father during college, instead of trying so hard to prove I was an adult and could handle everything on my own.

Why is he so mad about people’s knees??

Yeah, that part made me do an actual double take.

The person in the video sounds like Eugene Mirman to me.

I’m a female with a buzz cut, and I can’t tell you how many dudes try to rub my head. A fair amount of the guys I know have similar hair cuts, and yet my head is the fucking magic lamp of the office for some reason.

As an extra bit of icing on the douche cake, then they get upset when the poor people they pranked don’t just accept it. Like YOU’re the asshole for not being cool with them being an asshole.

Sometimes I’ll go to swap mine out and decide that my flow isn’t bad enough to warrant one, so I’ll have maybe one with the wrapper open in my drawer. It’s not super common, and it’s my personal drawer, and I’m not with a sadist, so I’m not worried I guess?

Scott Pilgrim. ‘No vegan diet, no vegan powers!’

Pcos here too, mine goes every 2-3 months, but then I get the period from hell. Like my body was saving up all the cramps and mess so I wouldn’t truly miss out. Thanks body.

This might be the quote of the day for me

10/10 would watch

It’s going to take them forever, there were like five dudes left. I’m not even sure how helpful their wives will be, you know some of them had to have been Yara for Queen fans.

It wasn’t even a dick I was interested in seeing, or even that good of a dick...it was meh.

When he gave that speech about how Yara should be queen, I was almost ready to forgive him for everything.

What made me more upset than Theon having to cosign, was the part where Euron asked her what he plan was for making the iron born great again....AND THEN HIM TURNING AROUND AND BEING LIKE YEAH THAT’S MY PLAN TOO. Fucking assholes taking credit for a woman’s good idea.

I was thinking more like mutilation or something.