OK, so I'm 99.9% sure this is the way it went down -she didn't submit her name for consideration (or submitted, and then withdrew), then someone asked her about it in an interview because they didn't see her name among the list of potential nominees and she explained it was because of the crappy writing. I don't…

I think they were going something like this hyper-realistic, totally possible in real life, never-been-done-before-on-film kind of character.

1. I'm thankful for good bowel movements because of my high fiber diet.

no one is playing stupid. People do recognize the phrase for what it is. Body shaming anyone is not ok. Hence the "we're all real."

I want an invite to your party!

WEENS ALL DAY, EVERY DAY. OR JUST WEENS SOMETIMES. OR WEENS NEVER. IT'S A PERSONAL WEEN-CISION.

"Help! My Gluten Intolerance Has Been Exacerbated by the Alignment of the Moons of Mars and Jupiter"

"I hope you're as happy as you're pretending." Such passive-aggression! Serious throwback to my high-school days.

It's not just these photos, it's literally all of the "candid" shots on her Instagram and site. It's amazing, because every time a new B photo shows up on Insta, I instance look for warp tool abuse. I don't have to look hard.

I like my gratuity grilled until it's tender. Please remember that for next time.

Country music needs to bring back the Nudie Suit ASAP.

She's Greek. We have olive oil flowing in our blood, keeping our skin youthful.

Flattered, totes obvi.

So ur with ur honey and yur making out wen the phone rigns. U anser it n the vioce is "wut r u doing wit my daughter?" U tell ur girl n she say "my dad is ded". THEN WHO WAS PHONE?

What ever happened to getting a babysitter? Aren't there times that you actually want to get away from your precious tax deductible?

There was a baby at GWAR at Riot Fest in Chicago.

This is my difficulty too. I understand if people were too concerned for their jobs, etc. to speak up, but then I raise an eyebrow at the way they're all waxing eloquent about it now. I guess that fear just melted away on Sunday night. These include artists and journalists I really admired and respected, but I…

I am obsessed with this story. Within about 30 minutes of finding out he was being fired (... I check CBC news frequently throughout the day, so I saw the article as soon as it was posted) I went from feeling sad to experiencing a feeling of impending doom with all the innuendo that immediately popped up on twitter.…

Now, for all you kids out there, the proper way to treat a lady is with respect. You see Dougie Gilmour out there? He always used to ask what his lady friends were into before he got them to agree to it. But that's just the way we did rough sex in Kingston, I tell ya. This John Gomechi is going to have someone take a…

Kate Harding wrote a fantastic article about this over on Dame Magazine. It's worth reading but I want to quote one part that made me practically jump out of my chair and yell in agreement: