If I’m shopping with my girlfriend, I find the best thing to do is to try to help her out. See, if I let her shop by herself, she’ll take an hour to find a pair of shoes and then not even get them. If I try to help, she’ll get so fed up with with me picking out terrible shoes for her that she’ll just give up and say…

That’s not a fact at all. It’s a marketing label. A tv might have 3840 pixels, and a light bulb might use 7 watts, those are facts. But Ultra-HDTV and an environmentally friendly bulb aren’t facts, they’re marketing terms.

“Environmentally friendly bulbs” isn’t a fact, it’s a label, like “affordable luxury car.” And since it’s presented as marketing, any adult should know that it might not be an objective truth.

You really should learn what a fact is before you say things like that.

Cherry picking data to support your hypothesis.

Considering in your second sentence you don’t seem to understand the difference between a hypothesis and a theory, you really don’t seem to have as robust an understanding of the scientific method (and I’m betting climate science) as you think you do...

“Are alternative facts really facts?”

Of all the possible comments to make you went with the most worthless one possible.

You are dumb as a box of rocks

He didn’t turn anyone white, he traced the composition of Beyonce, Obama, and Jay-Z and replaced them with some stand in government characters.

“Hot women rarely complain about sexism and successful minorities rarely complain about racism.”

I’ve got one better: Recently I saw some jackass online bitching about people who supposedly spend their time bitching about people online.

I think the important thing to point out regarding a dumbing down of generations is that Donald Trump is primarily the result of older generations, not the young adults that grew up with B&B (a great satire) and Dumb and Dumber.

The fact is Beavis and Butthead was a critique of the very society Sagan associated with the show. Mike Judge has spent the past 20 years trying to warn us all, but we were too busy laughing at the fart jokes to notice.

I know you dumb fucks are upset that we see that you are dumb fucks, and we think that you are dumb fucks, and we call you dumb fucks, and we don’t agree to validate your ignorance and coddle your prejudice, and some people think we’re not supposed to call you dumb fucks “dumb fucks” anymore, but I’m old school. You…

Yeah, that electoral college is shit, ain’t it?

We did vote. The majority of voters didn’t want him.

Pictured: What the inside of a house looks like when all the things a kid could potentially ruin have been removed.

It’s just commonly used terminology in the video recording space. Film, capture, record, etc.

Lucky they had so many dudes in the car.