Next we’ll have Jordan Morris coming in to replace Eden Hazard and Christian Pulisic to replace Cesc Fabregas. USA! USA! USA!

As an optimistic USMNT and Chelsea fan, I am stoked about this. Dude has the physical tools to kill it in the big leagues. And if all goes to plan, he could pair with John Brooks (also physically talented, but needs to get his shit together) for years to come.

God dammit its a slow week at work. I actually ran out of lists to read and was genuinely interested in looking for these damn pandas. This must be how teenagers these days feel.

Someone educate me again as to why Carly Lloyd’s midfield goal wasn’t a final nominee for the FIFA Puskas award? Aside from good ol’ fashioned sexism?

Well this definitely has the same feel as Varsity Blues, with Coach Kilmer getting kicked out by his players a year after winning another title.

And now lets all get excited for Mourinho to become the new coach of the USMNT after Jurgen gets fired for a couple of dumb losses!

Give him his Deadspin Hall of Fame nomination now at least. If the dictionary needs an image for the word “Welp”, this is it.

Yeah I love the Japanese production more than anything, but watch that youtube clip posted above of the latest dude to beat the whole course, compared to what the Americans have had to deal with. Their 1st and 2nd stages are a joke. I think the American version has definitely surpassed the Japanese one in difficulty…

Wow its been awhile since I’ve seen the Japanese competition, but dang, the US version looks 1000x harder than this now. It looks way low rent if anything.

you’re responding to the wrong dude, brochacho. Never said that.

I will always forever appreciate Matt Ufford’s posts about the dude on Kissing Suzy Kolber (RIP). Dude looked like a Mailman hired to play football too.

I came here just to make this comment. She appears to be the one Latina in the state.

Yeah if it was overly serious the entire time, it’d be another True Detective: Season 2. I’d say the world is closer to Breaking Bad, where there’s good people making tough, destructive choices amidst a secret world full of shitty people and organizations. There are plenty of moments of levity, and that’s what keeps…

Goddamn it I miss Shayla. I actually don’t think its a flaw that she’s gone and we are supposed to miss her alot still. The show did a kickass job in making her a fully fleshed out character, and not some random manic pixie dream girl that motivates Elliot to take action. Removing her has done the opposite, and makes…

Just beautiful white person passive aggression right there.

I am surprised Stoke City is not listed in the Bores section. I’ve considered them and Sunderland to be interchangeable ever since I got into the EPL in 2010.

I have never seen a more convoluted episode of TV in my life. That episode was the equivalent of rushing to finish your essay in class before time was up. You throw all the information you know out there, and just pray it somehow sticks and sounds about right.

I’m gonna call BS because didn’t they just freaking talk to this dude about Racist ass Hulk Hogan? This dude better not be pulling an Ultimate Warrior on us.

I will only be down for this if China annexes the Himalayas. Yeah it’d be pretty fucked on a human rights scale, but how wicked gnar gnar would those snowboarding events be, bro?

I feel like I read this exact article about Anderson Silva 6 years ago. The closing paragraph is the inevitable truth, and it will definitely be the end of an era once Ronda gets too old to just wreck on everyone with pure physicality.