Dude, you’re the one that keeps putting the corpses under the lightning so they can lurch back into town to face down the pitchforks and torches. If YOU say “I want to, but,” that sounds as damning a condemnation as I can think of.

Tracy, who normally finds something desirable in any Jeep-branded pile of shit-encrusted rust behind someone’s smoldering ruin of a barn fire, has weighed in:

Clarkson looks like lou Dobbs! lol.

“Look kids! A Plymouth Laser!”

Clearly Winner Ford lost their Focus and didn’t offer Flex time, but did have a Galaxy of compensation plans. To quote their general manager, “This verdict really Taurus a new one. There’s no way we can Escape.” They planned this as a way to Edge out the competition.

We already looked into “her emails” and also discovered that Drumpf is a corrupt, unqualified piece of shit.

You know how you can make tunnels more memorable? Name them after porn stars. I guarantee that, not only will name recognition go up, but interest in the back story as well.

I’d be ok with going through Cobie Smulders tunnel

My favorite are the interchanges dedicated to fallen highway patrolmen. I can’t think of a worse dedication to someone than naming a graffiti-covered LA freeway section after someone.

Tell people what they want to hear, then do whatever you want. It sucks.

Drain the swamp...into the streets.

At this point, he’s stocking the swamp with more alligators.

Someone doesn’t understand the meaning of “drain the swamp.”

can’t cross...a golf course

Nice price or crack pipe for the Jeep, I wonder?

The true hero of the piece is David “No Jeep Left Behind” Tracy who ignored the gunfire to walk out into no man’s land and fix the poor jeep’s broken wheel.

I want to punch the radio every time that comes on.

Single worst to me in the Metro Detroit area is Summit Place Kia radio ads. I change the radio station upon hearing it, my brain also refuses to remember any part of that annoyance.

If by awful, you mean I would give up my left testicle to drive one. Then yes, I agree 100%. Great article.