I still refuse to believe the Property Brothers could ever date anyone other than each other. I think Zooey is bearding.

HELLLL NO. My father shot my mother in a murder-suicide in 2017. This shit is why people had the audacity to say “They went together” or “They just loved each other to much” to me, and to talk about what a “wonderful husband” my father was. Those people didn’t read the police report detailing my mother’s defense…

Joanna Gaines is not a talented designer. Her aesthetic is boring.

All I can say is it happened, I don’t understand it years later, and I have not ruled out—as I wrote in my story—that my father was deranged and paid actors to trick me even as he was falling into dementia. Any which way, it was a fucked up thing that actually happened and left me with massive therapy bills.

‘You don’t wanna disappoint your Game of Thrones fans.’

Yogurt uses the Schwartz, come on. 

It’s always funny to watch people who are normally “yay capitalism!” see black people engaging with capitalism and are suddenly like “oh the horror!”

People who recline are monsters and don’t care what kind of misery they bring on others, so they are not likely to listen.

I think ultimately this argument comes down to who is obligated to use their words. My position is that if you want to recline you should have to ask the person behind you before doing so. Many, many others believe that you should be able to recline at your discretion and then make it incumbent upon the person behind…

Can we all talk some shit about the assholes who sit behind you and use your headrest to pull themselves up out of their seats?  There is nothing like dozing off in your chair with some headphones on only to have your seat suddenly buck backward.  Or if you are really lucky, they will get your hair stuck between their…

If you recline more than half way during daylight hours you are a monster. I actually pack so I can put my hand luggage under the seat in front of me to keep it handy (I knit during long flights), and if someone reclines all the way I can’t get to my stuff without banging the seat.

Which usually gets me screamed at,…

I hate recliners. I never recline, even if someone in front of me reclines (and I’m 5'8", so I’m not tiny), and I think those devices are a sign of the downfall of all that is good in the world. 

Okay, slimes in Washington aside, DC was built in a swamp (or tidal marsh, depending on who you ask) and summers tend to be very humid and recently much warmer, and winters are wet so is it really that out there that this is just a factor of the weather and perhaps climate change...?

Damn. If Charlie Murphy’s passing hadn’t already killed Black Jesus, this would certainly do it.

I use this line way more than anybody needs to hear it.

In the Vermont farm justice system, pumpkin-spiced offenses are considered especially heinous.

There’s also this classic Onion article:

There also used to be much more seat space, better service, and (on this particular subject) televisions down the aisles, though. In general there are a lot of ways that flying used to be much better and more comfortable.