Told Slant told them fuckers to get slanted.

Yeah. That's some seriously inflammatory rhetoric, let alone during these already charged-as-fuck times.

PoopScoop! ShovelButt! Ass-Eater Lad!

It's a Galactus miracle!

KraftSingles.com

This time, maybe Jessica Alba can reach deep down inside and pull out an acting emote that doesn't consist of a quizzically furrowed brow?

Clapping-seal idiots demand, nay BRAY! for more product!

Now now, you know Cousin Merle hasn't been right in the head lately.

Mountain (Dew) Goats!

I'd have asked for a fifth!

It's worse. Their big story today is the decline of FOOD WRITING. Fuck off.

I will when Ratt gets back together.

All they need to put in that contract is that you are not allowed to play unsanctioned nonSXSW events. Fine. That's standard.

I came early and made orange drink!

At the end of the day, it's less about Texas (Austin is one of the most liberal bastions on the globe) and everything to do with corporate monoliths having free reign to appropriate art for their commercial means.

It's been a crass compendium of the most overt and nauseating marketing-corporate sponsorship for years - but now they went full evil with that deportation threat.

Fuck you, SXSW

Written by and for a FORBCO MAN.

And yet, they're united in their condescending disdain for fucking Brown grads.

I minored in EXTRA FIXINS'