SUPER STOKED FOR A NEW DINO JR. ALBUM!

IS THERE A CHOLERA OUTBREAK PROMPTING A SPATE OF EXES DYING?

< INSERT GEICO LIZARD MEME HERE >

Good. It might be their Vietnam.

#TEALIZARD THINKS HE'S FRESH.

COAST ELITISM got me to my lofty position in life. Living beachside in a newspaper yurt.

FISH BE SALTY AS FUCK.

You NEVER know what will happen when #AGT is live.

What an inadequate turd. At first I thought he might be playing up to type, but he really is turning incandescent.

LOL, a fucking roast that has preset "verboten" topics?

Bea Arthur. Outstanding!

Anything between California and New York is "midwest" in my book. Or "flyover" if you prefer.

I learned about the Replacements from Airheads!

part of the charm, frankly.

john barlycorn?

sicko.

Residual aftereffects from My So Called Life?

Supper time!? You godless pinko.

Sheamus? Jobber? To the economy-priced Pitbull?

LOL, I barely know them outside of that mid-2000s staple song of theirs.