The 2005 Pride and Prejudice, with Keira Knightley and Matthew Macfadyen. It is a travesty. Totally misses the point of the book. It would be a nice period piece if it didn't claim to be based on the book.

I will live forever, because I do not want my name to be 'Paul.'

YOU GUYS ARE A BUNCH OF LYING BASTARDS GREAT.

Everything I do is 18.72% because of Beema. I'm afraid of him.

Wait, what? So there's a new format, but it'll still be at midnight central time?

I always brag when I get all four correct. It happens approximately twice a year.

To depress you.

A skeleton walks into a bar and says, "I'd like a pitcher of beer and a mop."

Mark, I'm so sorry. You have my deepest sympathy.

I won't remind you of any more scenes!

I come here to see what's on tonight, and to read and participate in the comments section. It's the one AVClub thing I do every day. Morning is not good for me.

I had to go back and watch the ending of Open Water again to make sure I understood what happened.

I was physically ill when they realized the road was bumpy because they were driving over dead bodies.

Related, One Day in September, about the Palestinian group Black September taking Israeli athletes hostage at the 1972 Olympics.

They're all despicable.

Reason #435 to hate Trump.

I don't agree with your description of Velocirapstar's posts. I enjoy them, especially the Trumpdates.

I thought you were 33 forever.

In Soviet Russia …

Ok, but give us something regular at midnight (central). Even just a feature titled "Hey, it's midnight!"