My personal fav is afternoon delight as well!

Yeah, this article should maybe be more about the wonders of Japanese telephoto lenses.

I once ate a whole watermelon at a summer camp I worked for in high school. It was a boredom thing, mostly. I think I was also trying to impress a female counselor (who wasn’t present, but I hoped would hear about the event), which gave me the required motivation to work through that fucking rind. The rind tastes bad,…

Hey, that snapping turtle is the most terrifying thing I’ve ever seen. I hate that animal and want it extinct.

We need 4 hippos and about 60 watermelons. Now

I honestly think the 41 presidents who came before Clinton had worse records on gay rights. In that gays had no rights and weren’t even a part of the conversation.

Only child, small rural town in Alaska, statistician and transportation planner. So 1~2 out of 3 depending how you classify the careers. :P

Wasn’t a book.
When I was in 3rd or 4th grade my Mom switched on PBS and told me to watch an episode of Nova, basically showing, in MICROSCOPIC detail, where babies come from.

I know that we had a sex-ed book, but don’t remember which one. But it stuck with me that I read the first time about cunnilingus in “Salem’s Lot” and it left me with conflicted feelings.

Kinsey Institute New Report on Sex, at the library, I think I was 12-13.

I hit puberty early and my very conservative catholic parents felt a need to address this but since my dad barely understood how his own junk worked they just got me some "My Changing Body" book, full of diagrams of pubic hair and sweat glans. However the one thing they did do was rip out all of the pages that dealt…

Quotes from the story, ranked:

“Yesh.”

Was in Portland and, whenever in Portland, went to Voodoo Donuts with friends. They had the doughnuts when we got there and one of our friends, the jokester, told me that I'd just eaten The Boobie. VD has weird names for some of their doughnuts so I thought nothing of it. It was a regular doughnut with pink icing…

Empty that thing out and it'd be full up to the gunwales with coyotes in a year. And then they'd burst out, a river of fiends thirsting for flesh.

I agree with everything you've said - apart from the references. I don't particularly want to be handing out my reference's contact information to anyone and everyone for one thing - who knows who could get their hands on it?

By a bit more work you mean a couple mouse clicks? Is LifeHacker now tailoring to Grandparents?

wth? What kind of article is this? Send this guy back to about.com

Ahhh, the Big Rock Candy Mountains. Where they hung the jerk that invented work.