I think the real issue here is that he's considering them "half empty." Let's be optimistic and call them "half full" and ready for the next adventure!

Growing up, my brother thought it would be hilarious to pull the old plastic wrap over the toilet bowl April Fool's prank. My mother went into the bathroom, noticed it immediately, and went and brewed a weak pot of tea. She brought it back into the bathroom and poured it over the plastic wrap, so there was yellowish…

What kind of demon question is that?!?!?!?! But always kill the NYPD. ALWAYS.

You missed the mark.

Please don't criticize my IBS. Check your digestive privilege, Jia.

Back to 1963? This is how it's always been (for black people). The only difference is social media documents it and makes it impossible (for white people) to ignore, although many are still doing their damndest to try.

I haven't even managed to escape the Kardashians and it's a little frightening. I have never willingly consumed Kardashian content, but I know most of their names and weird details about their lives. It's so concerning, HOW ARE THEY DOING THIS?

If the CIA thinks he has the flu, the one thing we can rule out is the flu.

Uhm, 15 + 6 = white and gold. Y'all are all fucked up.

I need to fucking hire Kris Jenner to manage my life is what I just learned.

I'm so sorry to hear that, you have my deepest sympathies.

this is one of the times when i feel an almost overwhelming love for my country

Point...counterpoint. I'm calling a tie.

Then you did actually learn something... that you are into lip gloss fetish videos.

Is it a debit card? They accept any type of debit card, I believe, but only Amex credit cards.

I've been thinking about streaks... just around my face.

IMMEDIATELY. BYE.

I love Goldie's high-waisted white leather pants in this scene. LOVE.

Mrs. Degree?