Never in the one I worked at. And they really should have washed them, with gasoline and a match.

*Anything* in hotel rooms. As someone who used to clean those, I can assure you they are even MORE disgusting than you know.

Oops, missed that someone had already posted this. It’s still funny anyway. :D

So catchy! So true! (for me anyway)

Sarah sounds like a great friend - and I am sorry to hear about her Dad, that must have been incredibly difficult for her.

I am sorry I read that - it made me throw up in my mouth a little bit.

In first year uni, there was a woman on my floor who would quite casually stroll to the bathroom with her can of air freshener and a newspaper or novel and would quite cheerfully let you know that she’d just love to chat, but she’s off for her morning poop and you’ll just have to wait.

I really, really admired her. The…

Oh, Jesus, no. Why the fuck would I want to commemorate anything about high school? High school SUCKED (ymmv).

My mother will be so relieved that the time she bled through all her clothes in a mall food court because her endo caused her to hemorrhage was just a figment of her sexually abused little lady brain.

Such a silly and hysterical creature! So creative when it comes to phantom, garbage illnesses! My Dad didn’t have to…

I wonder if LePage cross-referenced this binder full of criminals with Romney’s binder full of women.

COTD, right here. I think I love you.

What is it with people like that I wonder? Why are they so petty and miserable?

I...um...what?? with CANDY??? JFC.

I can’t help but see this as a “flatter your boss’s ego to get back in their good books” move.

If I get a bad review (one I legit. deserved) or get called out for something dumb that I did, then yes, asking my boss for advice on how to improve/make reparations is a good idea - I like being gainfully employed after…

This was my exact reaction. I have to stop thinking, “No, even Trump’s campaign wouldn’t do something like that. Jez is just having me on. It’s a joke.” and then...nope. No joke. It’s real—tiny plastic fetus in every gift bag.

Reminds me of the scene in Stephen King’s, IT, where the characters all go to a Chinese…

Donald Trump, a hexed tub of Velveeta that’s been brought to life and won’t stop screaming racist insults from inside your kitchen cabinet.

I wonder if I should send my Canadian family to go live with your in-laws. My Dad in particular (though I do love him) is esp. convinced that transgendered people are not “real”, that gay people are “gross” (unless they are beautiful straight girls kissing each other to get free drinks at bars), and he is convinced…

I do this too! I am not buying a new dress for every damn company party, and I have only ever had one person comment on my very practical rewearing of dresses to company parties. She’s a bit of a petty cunt, so I paid her catty comment no mind. No one else gave two shits or even noticed.

You must live in Vancouver - frozen pizza here is insanely fucking expensive and it’s not even that good.

Besides, if I make my own, I can put a buttload of green olives on it just the way I prefer. :D

That was all being spoken while Orlando was inside her.