For some reason or another, my brain first read that sentence as "an adult diaper White House kit". 

I was kinda joking at first, but I’ve realized how much fucking money they would bring in if they put up BTS statues. They’re like the biggest act on the entire planet. Tons & tons of tourism dollars.

I’m unsure as to just how many there actually are, but I know that there's definitely a whole lot of dudes in that K-pop sensation BTS. 

Semi-sweet, mind you (the same as the chocolate chips). Anyone who would eat unsweetened chocolate is truly a monster. 

They also ran this campaign in Canada about 10 years ago and it was incredibly successful, with people claiming that the "diamond" shreddies tasted better than the square ones. 

Just go eat the baking chocolate and/or chocolate chips if you're that desperate.  Personally, I like to smother the baking chocolate with peanut butter beforehand and then eat it with a glass of milk.  

Seriously. So I can patent or copyright a shape now? And it’s not an unusual shape, such as a star or a hexagon, it’s a fucking square! I’d be curious to see exactly just what is protected. Can Milka now make theirs a centimeter larger (or smaller)? Or are all squares now protected forever? I personally feel that…

It’s a European thing. Lotsa different flavors. Some are okay, but I’m not sure if any of them are great. Now I’m wondering just how big the regular sizes of German chocolate were at the time? I think it’s the Americans who finally got the idea of portable chocolate down to a real science.

Trump’s an idiot. What does he think is going to happen to his support as soon as a 40-something “regular” white mom gets severely injured or killed? Becoming more extreme doesn’t get Trump even one additional vote. However, if he became 50% more liberal tomorrow he wouldn’t lose any of his existing cult (because they…

Or his taxes. 

I’m actually wondering if he memorized those 5 words just for this interview. They would be particularly easy to teach someone to remember. In Trump’s brain: 1) who am I talking to? PERSON. 2) what types of people are there? WOMAN, MAN. 3) what am I looking at? CAMERA. 4) why is the camera here? TV.

Chilled pumpkin pie is pretty much the greatest breakfast ever. 

Just send him ANYWHERE that isn't in North America & I'll feel better. Maybe not Russia though, I could definitely see Putin setting up a Trump TV show just to fuck with western democracies.  

Okay, how about Mars? He would definitely like for his presidency to be associated with a Mars mission.  He could also take his 3 grifter children along so that they could spend the holidays together. I bet we could put a rocket together pretty quickly.  As long as they have enough fuel & supplies to get them far…

They should throw it in a blender along with some Big Macs & Diet Cokes send it along with Trump on NASA’s first manned mission to the sun. No one will have ever seen anything like that before. Truly a way for our favorite President to earn his place in the history books. I think that the technology is ready to go…

Why would any parent (yes, I’m looking at you, cousin Liza) ever name their child Tucker? Hasn’t it occurred to them that their child will be referred to disparagingly as “Fucker” for at least the first 2 decades of their lives?

I’m okay with it being used to enrich the soil as long as it’s first thoroughly diluted with manure and, even then, only used at former EPA superfund clean-up sites.

I’ll never defend any government agency as being perfect, but my late cousin was an agent dedicated to tracking the finances of terror groups & I can assure you that the FBI is a “real” & legitimate law enforcement agency and yeah, there’s no way that they’re getting involved in stupid political showmanship shit like…

ALSO - who’s doing their actual jobs right now? These are not members of the military who can be deployed at will. Supposedly these individuals have full time jobs which are deemed necessary by the U.S. government and I’m 99% sure that the various branches of U.S. law enforcement don’t keep hundreds of extra Statue…

Ohio has been responsible for much of the greatest underground rock music in the U.S. since the 1970's, so at least you've got that.  I also hear that you've got good wings (& beer) there.