I’m waiting for the War on Arbor Day before I jump on board.  Die trees, die! 

Woke up from sleeping in a booth at the bar which they locked me in the night before day. Oh wait, that one’s called Christmas.

He wouldn't marry her, but he would definitely degrade her. 

On behalf of the people of Canada, I can assure you that he does not have a girlfriend here.  

Snacksgiving? 

I spent a fair bit of time around them in the late 80's / early 90's as 2 different sets of friends had toured with them and......well, fuck, it was insanity. 

Is your time machine not working? I pity you.  

I think that crows & vultures might appreciate the offering and most people would be okay with that since they're not typically household pets. 

I’m curious about his logic that the first phone call could somehow effect the perception of the 2nd phone call anyway. It seems like an awfully weak defense. It’s like “okay, I know you’ve got the video of me robbing that bank on June 30th, but here's a video of me NOT robbing that bank on June 15th.  See? I'm…

Wait a second, are you telling me that Don Jr's book isn't a gay cowboy romance? RETURN THE BOOKS! 

I’m positive that there are at least 15 people who want to OWN the book, but I'm not so sure that anyone actually wants to read it.  

I would like someone here to read it so that they could tell us about its most ridiculous parts, but I'm sure not gonna be the one to do it.  

Also don't forget that Junior had to pay someone to write it for him, so he definitely took an advance.  

I can't wait to read the batshit stuff that Donnie's going to say at his rally tonight. The walls are slowly closing in on him. He barely tweeted today.  More & more evidence & witnesses are piling on. The courts aren't protecting his tax returns and it sure seems like he was freaking out at AG Barr prior to leaving…

1) They don’t actually realize that she’s “non-white”. Her name & appearance are “acceptably white”.

As long as the gators eat him. 

Just wanted to say hi to a fellow space monkey.  Hi! 

Do you know how old his father was when the dementia set in? I need to know.  

We'll run out of cows long before we run out of chickens.  

I also love Dunkin Donuts.