Internet: There will be a real life Pikachu Detective Movie.

Serious question - how the hell are so many people liking this guy’s tweets? Is he like some alt right hero now? Actually, that’s probably the answer.

Okay cool hook em horns is a great way to get out of a conversation

Because, like the rest of America, he hates Tom Brady.

I know we’re not supposed to question the coaching genius of Bill Belichick, but watching that gif makes you realize how easily Brady could have injured his shoulder being tackled on that play. Why in the fuck would you put your start quarterback in that position in the 4th quarter of a 17 point game, especially this…

<gently> He was actually able to stop dunking just fine. The image in the header is just a looping clip - it’s showing the same moment over and over, not actually condemning him to repeat his actions for all eternity. I hope this sets your mind at ease.

I would prefer he draw breath for the next 20 years in a jail cell as inmate number 6035821, with his adult offspring having some sequence of similar numbers that they are known by. And that by the time he gets towards the end of life that someone says “Are you DJT?” He says, “No.... I’m number 6035821. Do you have…

I will bet you a large sum of money that Trump’s statement has nothing to do with indigenous tribes or the effects of climate change.

There really are no words anymore......

So the latest item to add to the list of things Trump doesn’t understand is “what a river is and how they work” which is kinda ironic given he’s selling the US itself down one.

Eaux neaux

When you carry at least a half-pound of smoked brisket with you at all times, every joint is a new BBQ joint.

“Can I get in on that?”

But remember, we can’t blame him! There’s no connection whatsoever between the rhetoric of the most powerful office in the country and the actions of constituents who may not be in full possession of their faculties (or who may very well be, and are just evil, murderous assholes).

They’re only words! Words have no…

When we can no longer laugh, that is when hope is dead. All hope.

If you want to be dead serious all the time, and give yourself an ulcer over things that you cannot possibly control that is your prerogative, I on the other hand am planning on mocking the deranged orange shithead until the day he finally chokes to…

Good. I hope the knowledge is tearing away at his insides, making him shit himself 50% more often than usual.

Just me or was this even a more unhinged than usual from Mango Unchained? Apparently someone spent some executive time explaining that losing the House was bad.

“...it’s primarily a moneymaking concern that exchanges diplomas for sports service...”