I'm here every week! The column posts Monday mornings, although it does get pushed down the "Great Job, Internet!" list pretty quickly. If you click on the GJI header, you get a much longer list, so you can find the article if you've missed it.

Not surprised, just disappointed that the same shit exists in seemingly every culture throughout history.

I stopped drinking it as a teenager - I had trouble sleeping and thought cutting out caffeine might help. When you don't drink Coke for a few years and then go back to it, it's pretty off-putting. There are only very specific situations in which I enjoy it: the movies, and with Chinese takeout. And even then, it has…

No, I thought long and hard about those two before making the argument. I think those are perfectly good movies, that don't hold up to his earlier work. Any fairly decent director could have made The American President. Not many directors could have made When Harry Met Sally… and Misery in consecutive years. That's…

@avclub-e255a2ca61472d2e4198b1a703d9c4a5:disqus , I'm not saying it's dumb luck by any stretch. I'm just saying that, had a few things out of Coppola's control gone differently, it could have wound up as a much different film.

But so was everyone in America, back then! You could smoke in airplanes! You could smoke in the emergency room!

I meant to write more about the foreign flops, and only got as far as Troll 2. The Bollywood one on the list was interesting - a remake of one of the best-loved films India ever produced became one of the most-hated films India ever produced. Actualy, I guess that's not surprising. I imagine if someone tried to remake …

But even of those four, one was a sequel - it doesn't take a genius to say, "hey, that movie I made that everyone loved? Let's do more of the same!" (although it does take a near-genius not to screw that formula up, as exemplified by nearly every sequel ever made). And Apocalypse Now was very nearly a Heaven's Gate-sty…

Topic for side discussion: Rob Reiner’s ill-conceived 1994 flop North (also on the list) derailed one of the best careers any director has ever had. Roger Ebert famously wrote “I hated this movie. Hated hated hated hated hated this movie.” But the it was preceded in Reiner’s filmography by an unbroken string of…

I never think to check the project page! But I meant discussion in the sense of, "that's wrong and doesn't belong on the page," which accompanies seemingly every page on Wikipedia except this one, which is clearly an exemplary page, full of incredibly valuable information.

I know. I wrote the headline the way I did for the benefit of the 6 or 7 people out their who might not know what "twelfth doctor" refers to.

It was a rumor at one point, but I think that rumor may have started in this site's comment section. So don't get too excited.

It's on Netflix, as is the entire run of the show.

Yeah, everything I read about Simon in preparing the article just reinforced that he's a pretty remarkable guy. This news makes me very sad.

As much admiration as Simon deserves for his work on The Simpsons, my favorite thing he's ever done was the very first episode he wrote for Cheers, "Endless Slumper" - it's the one where Sam gives away his good-luck charm, and then gradually reveals to Diane that it's the thing that's kept him from drinking since he…

Now I wish I had seen Spite House first. That one's pretty great. A lot more history on each entry, for starters.

The criteria itself is very fuzzy. But I still found the idea fascinating. And, again, Six-Story Elephant Hotel (which is also the name of my favorite Guided By Voices song).

Next week, we're doing "List of Symptoms of CancerAIDS"

Damn it, for every Wonka/Bond joke I thought of, there are like ten more that got away from me!

Thank you! Like all writers, I live on praise. And foodstamps.