Beirut tables are so 2007. Tell this guy to get a Beach House table.

Maxwell told The Press of Thunder Road that Southern Regional High School "is full of losers and I'm pulling out of here to win".

A Beard hasn't taken a beating that badly since Al Bundy verbally abused Marcy D'Arcy every Sunday night in the late '80s.

Upon hearing that Tiki Barber had deemed AD a "liability", Emmitt Smith jumped to Peterson's defence, saying that, "He's always been truthful to me".

Fuck you, Mike Ellsworth. Some people just don't wanna make candles.

Don't misadventures with best friends named Cameron normally lead to playing hooky and hilarious teenaged hijinks?

The last participant of a "Who Drag?" parade was Jorge Cruz, Jr.

The list of transgressions includes bringing in players who have already proven they are capable of succeeding in ny.

Equally embarrassing, Borges once wrote a 1985 column about the impressive pick-off move of Bruce Hurst. He entitled it "Hurst's Infield Vision" and wrote that he hoped it was contagious amongst the rest of the Boston staff.

Chicken's fried at 360 °. Fine. Because you're the line cook at Popeye's Chicken & Biscuits.

Shelley Long wishes she didn't leave the Chambers for anything.

Pulling a "Kaká"

Apparently, Ashley Cole is so sick over the news, he vomitted all over another hooker.

I tell ya, the language barrier can really throw an Ankara on understanding.

Tiger just had a wandering eye. And that is something that many people can relate to personally.

@ScientificMapp: It's almost as if he's cured Insomnia.

"Subject had slurred speech, blood shot, watery eyes and he was unsteady on his feet,"

Abe PECOTA was hilarious on Barney Miller.

@Kid Canada: If I remember correctly, the whole purpose behind "Brawl for All" was for it to be a vehicle to get Steve Williams over, no?

...we all know that this wrestling stuff is fake, we knew that Williams could really kick anybody's ass.