Bloody nose and lip pulling up my own bra strap. My hand slipped and I punched myself.

Whenever this debate comes up on whether or not it's pee, I am brought back to tenth grade science class. I asked my teacher during the sex ed portion what the composition of female ejaculate was, and she got red in the face and said to me, point blank, that females don't ejaculate. My response? "You must not watch a…

who cares just get it in my mouth! Am I right, straight fellas and lesbians? *searches for someone to high five and settles on his dog"

In my own personal study that was conducted twice yesterday afternoon because I was home alone and bored, I can categorically assert that it is definitely not pee.

Yeah— what's up with that "Is that all right, appearing nude?" She's a grown woman, a professional actress, and Letterfuck is asking her if it's all right for her to appear nude? As if she needs TV Daddy's permission? Seems like the paternalism was laid on thicker than peanut-butter all around.

IF I CRY EVERYONE CRIES

I have to believe that the universe is converging upon this very moment for Lisa Bonet to finally, triumphantly slap the mess out of her TV family.

hm how about y'all fuckers try not disrespecting the dead officers by pushing your shitty union agenda during the funeral? how about you actually pay your condolences to the family in mourning & not your own fucking victim complex.

I cannot even handle this right now. That beard and that smile and the perfect sweater/dress shirt combo and the gentle hand touching and just basically everything about this is just too much and I am in love <3

"Wait for the facts" is usually pretty good advice. People have an alarming propensity for sticking by their first stated assessment, even after the appearance of clearly contradictory evidence. But THIS. A couple dozen women have come forward with near-identical allegations and you think it's reasonable to dismiss…

a "beer can thrown over the fence into the neighbor's bushes."

The fact that she's arguing that we should forget these real women and remember the fictional Cosby family is just amazing. Amazing. Phylicia, you have entered the realm of the surreal.

Ok, yes, I understand why one would use caps to stress a word. This is a concept I understand. What I do not understand is why you would stress "BY" in that sentence. Typically, one uses caps/italics to stress a word in comparison to another word that goes unsaid, but that might otherwise be expected to take the…

I said "PUPPY" out loud. Reflexively.

bet the records? what was the over under?

In NYC there is a law that homeless can be removed against their will when temperatures drop below a certain level. On the news here they advised us to call the cops if we see someone on the street so the cops can come and take them to shelter, whether they want to go or not.

The coldest, saddest puppy in Illinois

I'm in that -40 region. It is unreal. My dog has never been so acutely aware of her exposed butthole. She's not having it. PS: I wish I were doing both aforementioned activities, but alas, I am working. Eff.

ENJOY YOUR EARTHQUAKE INTO THE OCEAN! *Sobs into ice*