They would have just blocked each other, but neither one knew how.

"Dammit, I could've stripped you, too, Beagle." - Mark Watney

Looks like a schematic I had presented with a girlfriend a while back...

Ray Rice gets two weeks (initially).

"How should I feel about this?" - America

Oy. It's "Tunechi." And he says it in the YOLO song with Drake.

FIFA: For when you want to feel better about the NFL.

Come on, man. He's not going to Cleveland. His wife owns that juice bar in Miami. You think she's just gonna sell that thing and open another one up in Cleveland? You know how annoying it is to get a zoning permit and pass inspection from the health department? She's not gonna go through all that all over again.

Come on, it's got "best" right in the name. But seriously, the Besta series brings a crazy amount of customization even by IKEA standards, starting simple and affordable and expanding to include everything from floating cabinets to pink accents. [IKEA Besta]

Come on, it's got "best" right in the name. But seriously, the Besta series brings a crazy amount of customization…

Do you really need further explanation of what "Dated and Offensive" means?

KEN MERTZ

My 10-year-old takes the "don't go crying to your mama" literally and thinks this is the meanest song she's ever heard.

You're totally, totally wrong. Paramore have been around for nearly ten years now, and the whole time they've been a total jam factory. Their second album, Riot! was heralded by critics, and deservedly so, because it was badass. For years now they've been writing calculatedly catchy pop-punk songs that have a really…

I am 27-year-old heterosexual man and I like to play this song loud in my car with the windows down.

and since the previous WC party bombing was almost 2 weeks ago, enough time had passed?

Giuseppe Rossi ain't one of those four— he didn't make Italy's 23.

Oh, shut up: it was a great match. If you cannot enjoy those incredible saves seen today don't even bother watching soccer.

I hope they can get the player's to pronounce their own names because hearing that guy mispronounce two rather simple U.S. player's names (Besler and Beasley) didn't inspire much confidence.

In fact, why can't FIFA just give us what has become standard practice for every NFL broadcast and film a short clip of each…

Size 8s and Heartbreak

People reported hearing screams before the fire. One victim has been I.D.ed as "Wilhelm".