Ohhh yeah, my torso hardly tapers at all.

Sophie has some mushroom cousins that are about 10 bucks less and look kind of like penises. My oldest two got those. I called them Squeaky Weens, much to the dismay of my mother in law.

If i wasn’t act work I would post the video of the Chris Rock bit about bullets being $1,000 each and how that would reduce drive by shootings.

If your hands do get stinky, get yourself one of these. I don’t know how they work other than it’s probably dark magic, but they are amazing. You can have the stinkiest, garlickiest, hands in the whole world, and you rub your aluminum soap bar on them for 5 seconds and it’s all gone.

JOYSUCKER!!!!!!! YOU’RE SUCKING THE JOY YOGA!!!!

GET OUT OF HERE WITH YOUR FANCY MEDICAL EDUCATION, DOC

As a non-American, this was a very interesting read to me. I have a 1 1/2 year old, and I can honestly not relate to any of this. Part of me is kind of scared that this is because I only hang out with alcoholics - but on a more serious note I think there are some significantly different cultural approaches to the…

Did you know that Nothing Compares 2 U was written by Prince? I remember that little music trivia tidbit kinda blowing my mind when I first learned about it.

On the one hand, I’m super sympathetic because it’s obvious she’s in tremendous pain and needs help. But on the other hand, I have a super toxic mom and for my own sanity have to keep her away from me and this is precisely the shit she’s pull to try and get attention from me. (She let my abusive ex husband move in…

My 15 day old son already has a gmail account with his name.

In the future, people will choose their children’s names based on which google accounts are available. Truth.

It’s becoming more common to set up your kid’s email etc when they are young so that the usernames aren’t taken when they are older.

This photo makes me feel weird.

Roseanne, please tell me more about Happiest Trails behind you...

I have seen both and been a receptionist. I did turn gay, though.

I know. Deklan is a terrible name.

Not all women have Buckwheat in a leg lock believe it or not.

I am ever so reluctant to pull this card, but having been a victim of sexual abuse myself along with my cousins, I just hate this piece of shit.with my entire soul. As a man I was not allowed to talk about it. I was called a liar by my own family as were my two women cousins. The horror never ends. It has permeated…

Sure. She COULD have done that. But ballers gonna ball.