My only real take away from the article is that there's an actress named "Fan Bingbing".

YOU ARE AS AN ANT TO US, THE MASTER RACE. WE DO NOT WANT YOU USING OUR KEYBOARDS AND MICE IF YOUR POOR MOTOR SKILLS PREVENT YOU FROM EARNING YOUR PLACE AMOUNG US. WE HAVE SPOKEN.

Please don't represent Americans by traveling abroad if you are a stupid cunt face bitch.

Playing through Faxanadu makes you about the baddest mother fucker on earth. I don't even know what doing more than once makes you.

INTERNET?!? BWEEEEAAGGHHHH WHATS THAT?!?

Way to fact check, CNN.

Poor guy. Now people can do this:

I really like the taqueria near my house.

Wait...LttP2...Earthbound on VC...OH SHIT I MUST HAVE SLEPT THROUGH MY ALARM CLOCK AND DREAMED I GOT UP AND WENT TO WORK AND I'M ACTUALLY STILL AT HOME ASLEEP FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

If I wanted to feed the hungry, I would just feed the hungry rather than buy headphones.

Dino Crisis?

Digital James Franco Butt

"laser"

What's wrong with manatees?

NO IN DA BROC

The real problem here is that now, Juicy Couture stores are going to be staffed by disgruntled employees who can't pretend to care about my clothing purchases or part time new hires that are to stupid to breath, let alone run a cash register efficiently. It's going to take probably an extra 15 minutes to deal with…

Did anybody expect that major corporations would sacrifice a small part of their ridiculous profits if they could fuck over the employees instead?

Wut?

I don't understand why everyone's mad that she was a good mother and cook and a dutiful wife and also did something with rockets one time.

WAKE UP AMERICA