It’s soap...with a handle.

That’s some Wile E. Coyote-level imagery there.

Wow, that’s like Dumb & Dumber-level material. “Yeah, twitter, you’ll see!!!”

With the proper headgear those semis bounce right off!

I actually like black wheels on white and silver cars. It’s the uninviting abyss of black interiors that’s a hard no for me.

Just a driver’s license and a sense of adventure

Feel free to borrow my apartment end-of-lease exit strategy where I fill unsightly holes with toothpaste. The science should translate flawlessly here!

Soon to be on Craigslist for $500K. “I know what I have!”

The lack of logic here is astounding.

The lack of color is apocalyptic.

To be fair, she only wants natural things in her body. Like breast implants.

I only asked you to look into it, Larry. And isn’t your lunch break over?

Yeah, I was really expecting some kind of outlier. “It doesn’t drive like a go-cart, but...”

This guy is SUCH an asshole. “Look at me, I’m owning the libs!” And a 1/6/21 seditionist to boot.

A ‘74 was my ‘80s high school car until I bent the axel and sold it for...$800, maybe? If I knew I could get this kind of money for it now it would be that thing in my parents’ garage “you need to do something about.”

I run mine through the dishwasher now and then.

RE: Town Car: “the truth actually is that you secretly lust after cars of this ilk.”

“Wuh?”

“Name a bad place to play musical chairs.”

At that point it’s like waiting for a pizza: “That doorbell will ring any minute now!”