You’re so wrong. He robbed the casino alone. He got away alone. Two weeks later he gets caught while stumbling and bumbling. Movies and TV portray cops and surveillance like they are infallible and everywhere when what we really see, what we believe is the norm, are just the successful cases. If the cops told us every…

Actually sounds like he robbed a casino of 23 grand and successfully fled in a taxi. Where’s all this armed security and police presence of which you speak? Thought the finale would be he was caught in 15 minutes, not 15 days.

California should file some secession bills to make the Feds stfu.

My old man complaint is player salaries. As a youth I complained that the salaries hurt the team but now I complain that they hurt America. $25 million per year for a [position player] to spend on a wife, three kids and a mistress? Meanwhile the pothole at [intersection] gets wider and deeper.

That’s some trillion dollar contracting right there.

They are typically smart regarding what they know but stupid when they start believing their beliefs are automatically smart.

The situation is fluid. It has been 14 months of headlines that largely center on Trump’s ineffectual governance

Ga Tech doesn’t pay athletes that much to jet to Vegas for trim.

Ten steals could beat 10 blocks. Maybe.

Well actually . . . Washington has no state income tax.

Seattle is surrounded by wineries.

Twitter was a god damn mistake.

Gluten free fruit.

Organic is the only way I can get peaches that taste like peaches anymore. Or drive 60 miles south to the orchard. Don’t know where I would have to drive to get tomatoes that taste like tomatoes. Watermelon hasn’t tasted good in years.

Not believably fuckable anymore.

What Leigh Raven does for $money$ is her business but stop pretending she’s kidnapped off the street and guns are held on her as she gets choked out. If she wants out of a scene she has to pay a kill fee — you know, pay back some of the god damn money. And then she’s known as “hard to work with.” Wait, she can fuck…

You should then say, “most men I have fucked” as opposed to most men think this is what sex is. And stop fucking your brothers and dad. That incest porn stuff you watch is parody, not a documentary.

He/she/it only watches bondage porn.

You told us to just shut up, remember?

I also sign with a squiggly underneath the text. Where’s my alibi app?