I’m 43 and I just bought a Doctor Who cardigan at Hot Topic. I couldn’t afford it as a teenager, I might as well enjoy it now.

don’t judge me guys, my inner goth-teen is coming out in full force.

People talk so much trash about SNL, and I get that they’re not always 100%, but they’ve got a pretty great cast IMO at the moment and the ladies in particular are crushing it

I am honestly super curious how someone can even HAVE 100 pages of alibi documents. My alibi for any given night would be like 2 pages, tops, full of receipts from chipotle and something documenting what I watched on netflix.

Dude. That’s some fucked up reasoning right there. What she does on film has no bearing on what she consents to in real life. And you absolutely don’t have the right to do anything to a sex worker that she doesn’t want you to do (that’s rape, apparently you need that point it clarified).

Can someone enhance this?

PREACH. No one goes to Chipotle because they want authentic mexican food. I do not consider it Mexican food at all actually I just consider it fucking delicious.

Also, doesn’t anyone actually listen to to god damn lyrics of Born in the USA?

Jack: The American public doesn’t want your elitist, east coast, alternative, intellectual, left wing...

Cruz: “New York? *wink wink* “BAAAAAAAAD”

I was a pre-teen with a deep longing. But I did have yellow patent leather boots with that buckle. And I did perform “These Boots Are Made For Walking” in them. It was a Rosh Hashona 5732 highlight.

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS:

You deserve millions of stars for this comment.

“Women’s rights became important to me after I had a daughter.”

I’ve seen people tearing the father to shreds for leaving when commanded (by gun). I know that it’s a tragically difficult scenario to imagine, and people’s instincts are to stay with their children no matter what, but who knows what would’ve happened if he stood his ground? At least this way he was able to leave and…

Dear Bill A. Bear,

I’m kind of just glad that the girl version isn’t corrected to say “Young Aspring Cutie Pie” or some such horrid thing. I guess my expectations are low.

I’d hate to be the graphic artist who was hired to design that t-shirt.

I have a more general “This is the start of the story I will have to tell” moment, imagining cops, trial, friends, family. Grim.

YES. As someone who works at a hospital, if we don’t work up everyone who comes in, regardless of how often they had been there, we aren’t doing our jobs. It’s called negligence, and it’s how hospitals lose their accreditations. Example: patient comes in saying that they are going to kill themselves because of x,y,z,…