“I can still see his lips coming straight for my face.”

I hate Henry. It is like he has been intentionally trying to win a Darwin award. He was even dumb before the time-skip.

you wasted so much money

I love the idea that in real time the ref was like, “pivot-caught the ball-one-two-lost control-pivot-pass-legal.”
Second, we’re like two weeks from Harden just bobbling the ball from hand to hand as he walks down the court before plowing headlong into a defender actively running away from him and getting like 10…

This is really getting a little out of control. It seems everyone but me has now seen Jeff Bezos’ dick, and I’m having disgusted fomo.

Ooooh! Here we go again, folks! Let’s take yet another trip down the patented Trump Stages of Denial!

Meanwhile, Eric is Jorma in this Lonely Island sketch.

“im not political! im not political!!”, i continue to insist as i slowly shrink and transform into a corn cob

wat

If Amazon doubled the median annual pay for their 125,000 warehouse workers from roughly $28k to roughly $56k, the annual cost of $3.5 billion would be in the range of their profit projections for the fourth quarter alone.

The clipped cadence, the sentence fragments, and the meandering observations reminds me so much of the writing from Witcher 3 that I can’t stop hearing Geralt’s voice when I read them.

B.J. in 2015.  B.J. again in 2019.  I think all the married guys can relate.

RIP baby girl.

For inflicting Gordon Ramsay and Russell Brand on us for starters.

Completely unrelated to anything here, but I just read this short story (about an hour long read) and..... GODDAMN.

Just spotted Cody Parkey on his way to Miami to assume the identity of a female police lieutenant.

Double Doink, you say?

“Lisztomania” is a banger to this day.

When I was growing up, the only radio station was Thomas Edison reading the alphabet. A, he'd say. Then B. Then C. And that was usually followed by D.