broke: 30 second Super Bowl Commercials
woke: 2 week long ARGs that culminate in a 60 second, $25 million ad where a “beloved” brand mascot comes back with a new coat of CGI paint and a more affordable celeb voiceover

An STI engine swap would, of course, be neat but I’m just happy with the blue lighting if I’m honest.

I would think shaking a person with a medical emergency would be the last thing you would want to do.

Damn those pants are super tight , there is no way I would fit into them unless…
I better shape up.

Plot twist, this was all an elaborate scheme by Elway to kill Joe’s career for good after the mile high miracle in 2012. 

Meanwhile, I’d just like to remind people what it was like to have a GOAT who could genuinely laugh at himself:

God, I don’t even have one dick growing out of my forehead.

“That’s the plan.”

They were also cheating because the running back is 33 years old and also Marshawn Lynch.

Too bad the rest of the footage from that game is an illegal snuff film

He is the first Packers QB in the Super Bowl era with a perfect rating, and he is the first QB to pass for five touchdowns and run for one more since 1991.

Still not clarified, is it the low knee or the high knee.

Ever since the MOVE bombing, I’ve refused to buy a house in Philadelphia.

Charles Davis was on The Fan 590 in Toronto this morning saying that he thinks Andy Reid might sign Kaepernick and used Reid signing Vick after the dog fighting as a comparison.

The name of this play is “Pence Turkey Cease Fire.”

But really, how many kinds of toilets are there? You’ve got ass, piss, vomit, and doggie drinking bowl.

I didn’t read the article, but I assume you’re blaming Tom Brady and the Patriots, based solely on the header picture. I would like to offer my wholehearted agreement. Fuck Tom Brady and the Patriots for ruining officiating, and just in general, really.

Good Head, Boner Combine To Get FCUM All Over The Internet

Okay, but what are your thoughts on crystal tits?

Using a towel where you sit is proper etiquette in most nudist communities. Not so ridiculous.