Raiders Captain.  That should be an automatic five games right there.

Jane Lynch is a treasure and Cyndi Lauper has always been money.

There can be only one...

That’s some pretty good Kinja.

What we really need is a thorough analysis of the schedule to see which division has the best chance of having a Division Champion with a losing record. You hear me, AFC South? make this happen!

So, I know you think Gruden is going to be the first one to eat it this year, but are you 100% SURE it won’t be John?

I don’t understand the calls that just hang up if I pick up. What are they getting out of that?

So you think taking pictures of a naked teenage girl with a hidden camera is NOT necessarily child porn?

$0th1sW1ll$00nh@ve2BmyP@$$w0rdbutw1ll@l$0n33d2Inc0rpor8MyB@11$@ck

Well, without penises, there would be no children.

Fucking Volvos...

All of television can stop now.  It will never get better than this.

So...

I was reading this while attempting to do my homework for an online college class, but naturally I was procrastinating by web surfing which led me to Jezebel as just one of the many Gawker Media (is it still called that? I never know.) sites which I frequent while putting things off as I was a few days ago when I was…

I went to the grocery store three days ago and the cart I chose had a wobbly left front wheel. I considered replacing it, but then ran over a carelessly discarded snap-pea in the produce section. Somehow, enough of the snap-pea remained lodged in the wheel to mitigate the wobble just enough to allow mw to finish…

You have to know they’re always listening, too. Even if you THINK you’ve kept the swears away from your kids, they know.

I often over-sexualize syndactyly.  David Letterman is SO hot! 

*underappreciated

Actually, that’s a very common condition. It’s called, OHGODWHATTHEFUCKHOLYSHITGETTHATAWAYFROMMEDONTGETITONYOUMOTHERFUCK-itis.