You mean you went through college without ever sticking your finger into an Ethernet jack? How did you manage that?

I wonder how this is going to affect his educational opportunities. Is it possible to complete a couple years of college anymore without touching the internet even once? Applying, registering for classes, submitting work, getting class information, researching papers, etc. Yeah, millions of college students did it for…

Those hand pants — I'm pretty sure I saw Anthony Kiedis wear those in 1992.

If I watch "Hoarders" as I clean the house, what am I supposed to do as I watch this?

That's why I save the dishy shit for in person, after 1 AM, nine beers deep.

Lots of directors make violent movies. Paul Verhoeven makes movies that are violent in a way that actually disgusts me. They make me nauseous. And I like that. Without the Verhoeven puke factor, the Total Recall remake just didn't do it for me. I fear the same will happen to Robocop. Murphy's shooting, the crotch…

My only guess is that some people love to shop on Black Friday for the same reason some people love to fuck at orgies and sex clubs. It's smelly, uncomfortable, noisy and crowded. It's sometimes very awkward and weird. And what you end up with may not exactly be up to your personal tastes and standards had this been…

Zoo habitat for iron butterflies.

Here's an example of trolling so dense it's reached critical mass. The trolliness of the original comment is so overwhelmingly obvious that an observer addressing its trollitude is himself committing an act of pure trolling. Should a second observer call out the first observer on his trollish behavior, that too would…

Measured purely a mistakes-to-word ratio, this may be the most error-heavy article I've read online in my life.

Have a nice weekend, Casey!

Yeah, mass transit is where public nudity gets a little sticky. For one thing, there are a lot of urban nudists who do not observe the towel rule when sitting down. And the possibility of standing nudsters makes stepping onto a crowded bus or subway train even more stressful for children and short people.

The way my SF friends explained it to me was that this guy backed off on the no-nudity agenda and instead focused on banning naked men from wearing cock rings in public. Perhaps I misunderstood the details. But cock ring legislation was definitely on the table.

This is true. Trimming is one thing, but a full-on shave makes the thing look like a sad little radiation sickness patient.

Did anyone else imagine James Cromwell in the role of the doctor?

If vampires never age, does that mean Edward and Bella's baby will be a vampire baby FOREVER?

Also, always leave the front door to your home unlocked so you don't have to dick around with your keys all the time.

That's odd. It looks just like my clothes hamper ...

Zero fun.

Stiffly stifferson.