I'm surprised it's ONLY 51.3 percent. Though I do appreciate the lack of lag you get with a landline. There's nothing like that constant stream of "what was that?" "what?" "say again?" you get from constantly interrupting each other during a cellphone conversation.

Might this have something to do with the context in which soda of all sorts – diet and otherwise – is often consumed? Personally I think of soda as a complement to fast food. You go into a restaurant that serves mostly garbage (DELICIOUS GARBAGE!), and you order a soda to go with the meal because ... well, I don't…

A mighty telescope, built strong and true by Hill People.

The best way to tell a general audience what "LulzSec" means is to explain that anyone who doesn't already know is likely afflicted with a learning disability. Furthermore, they should all either flash their breasts or leave the room.

Given the overall job market, and the fact that most Apple store employees have probably never had to mop up a puddle of customer vomit, I might just have to break out the tiny violin for this one.

Just wish they'd have a more organized way of actually buying stuff. It's kind of frustrating to have to flag someone down when all you want to do is exchange money for goods. I'm perfectly OK waiting in a line — at least then you know where you stand and that you'll get to the front eventually. But at Apple stores,…

I prefer reading reviews from blackballed sources.

Did anyone else start humming the music from "Tailspin" while watching that?

What if a woman goes to her boyfriend's house, signs onto her Netflix account using his computer and starts watching with him? Are they in the clear as long as her eyes are glued to the screen for every frame? What if she looks away for a moment? Then it's clearly a case of a guy using someone else's account in his…

"Arr, matey. Nary a warning light to be seen. 'Tis clear sailing ahead for our precious cargo."

You'd think they could give them some kind of big-board/Wargames/Dr. Strangelove kind of digs. High ceilings, giant display at the front, kinda dark, boss's office elevated about 10 feet off the floor, etc. This is the U.S. State Dept., not a NewEgg order fulfillment center.

Hell, even the Lucky Charms box at least gets the dignity of going into the recycling bin. Isn't there a school somewhere with an AV dept. that could maybe make use of these things?

You have my support on this idea. I'll do my part by going out at night and eating cars — Cadillacs, Lincolns, Mercuries, quite possibly Subarus as well. Following that, I'll move on to eating bars — where the people meet.

"It's magic."

Maybe the study's legit, maybe not. But I bet a few scatterbrained idiots (yep, they exist too) are going to use this to explain why they just can't get a damn thing done. Too smart to pay attention, la la la la la!

I don't think I've seen a single word written in legible cursive in the last 10 years. When I do see cursive writing, it's unreadable, without exception. I look at it and think, "What is this, some private language you share only with your secret twin? How do you expect anyone except yourself to understand this?"

Buster Keaton may have been involved somehow.

So if this is as bad as it sounds, we might actually be part of the big die-off ourselves. Well, it was a good run. Fun times. At least we got to play with some cool shit before we checked out. Dinosaurs never got to to that.