Pregnant women should be on bedrest, listening only to Mozart and Baby Einstein cassettes, watching only Oprah and National Geographic documentaries (but nothing involving violence), and consuming only doctor-approved, AMA-approved, Doctor Oz-approved IV fluids and nutritional supplements. For the entire 9 months. And…

@Hell on Heels: Me too! I just went to one where they did both the "Single Ladies" bouquet toss AND the oldest couple in the room deal.

@stew: Oh jeez, what's wrong with the money dance? It's vulgar, but so is EVERYTHING to do with weddings. You're already catching a freaking bouquet of flowers and doing the chicken dance, so why not do the money dance too? You're already supposed to buy an engagement party gift, a wedding shower gift, and then a…

I got married five weeks ago. My mom bought a bunch of bridal mags for me, which I flipped through a month or so before the wedding. Absolutely none of it was relevant to me, especially the articles that read "Bargain Buys! Ten wedding dresses under $3000!" Three thousand motherfucking dollars? Are you fucking kidding…

@Snizzy-Snazz Bullets: Mine was gone at the age of 10. Split the balance beam. Had to sit on ice for 2 days.

@skatez: I got married three weeks ago. My husband and I got engaged in March and basically had five months in which to plan a giant hoedown/barbecue for 150 people. We hired a band, rented tents, tables, and chairs, built a stage, put up bunting and flags (county fair theme), hired a caterer, and bought all the…

@fishlikesequins: I don't think most of us Obama voters think he's magical or Mr. Fix It. For me, the prospect of a reasonable, intelligent person as president was an exciting one. That's really all it took to get my vote.

@liberatedword: Yeah, there's a condition called vaginismus which can make vaginal sex painful. It's fairly common for sex to be painful. You do not have to live with it! If your ob/gyn is not helpful, then go to planned parenthood. The docs/RN's there are amazing and excellent listeners, in my experience much better…

@CynicalPink: I second your analysis of scaled scores.

@purppurp: The LSAT is bullshit. I went to a T14 school, and one of my friends graduated magna after scoring extremely low on the LSAT for the school's range. So don't let it get you down. It won't predict your success as a lawyer.

@Ulookinatmyjunk, JOC: If you've never read The Chronicles of Narnia, you ought to. For the love of God, stay away from the Wheel of Time series. The first three are OK, but the following six or seven are pure schlock. By then you're invested and you keep reading because you want to know what happens!

@MalinaMango: I am mildly afraid of flying. It may sound counterintuitive, but it always helps me to call my mom and my husband before I fly and tell them I love them. That way, if the plane goes down, at least I said it. I don't know, it just makes me feel calmer.

@SarahMC: Yup. No tops necessary. The top only emphasizes the future boobage. Totally inappropriate in a little bitty child.

Right now in my home town, the trial of 8 young men accused of gang raping a woman, beating her and her young son, and then forcing the two victims to have sex, is ongoing. It's one of the most horrific crimes I've ever heard of, and it's totally undisputed that this rape happened. The only quibbling is over which…

I love Heather Armstrong. She writes with humility and humor and a little raunchiness about her everyday life with a husband, two daughters, and two dogs. I think she was perfectly justified in bellyaching when her brand new Maytag washer malfunctioned for the nth time, and I fully support her decision to keep taking…

@diamonddnice: Also, chocolate coated frozen bananas are not all that bad for you. The actual amount of chocolate is pretty negligible, and the banana and the peanuts contain natural sugars and fats. The Trader Joe's version contains 160 calories, 8 grams of fat, and 13 grams of sugar. It's not exactly health food,…

@diamonddnice: I think you're being a jerk here. Sorry, I've got no other word for it. I'm sure others have pointed it out before me, but for lots of people, being healthy does not mean having a little waist and large hips and bust. Being healthy can mean: carrying some extra weight in the belly but having toned arms…

Yeah, I read this article today and thought that it conflated affection with approval. My parents did a pretty good job of separating the love they felt for my brother and I (completely unconditional) from their reactions to our grades and choices in life. My parents may have withheld their approval at times, but…

Yeah, this is not my dream job. My husband? He'd love it.

@GirlyQ ain't a-marchin' anymore: When my parents figured out I was having sex at the SCANDALOUS age of 17, my mom freaked the fuck out and wouldn't speak to me for an entire weekend. My father on the other hand talked to me about sex, asked if I was being safe, and then told me gently that he knew I was in love and…