oh man, i've been graduated since '07 and i'm SO EXCITED for a rachel maddow-smith college collision. i am so crashing this ish.

"The Cloris Leachman Honorary Grandma Award"

when i had a computer for work, i assumed it was pretty constantly monitored. because—here's the fun part—they TOLD ME it would be monitored. any public school open for more than ten minutes knows how to compose a waiver. ass-covering fail, LMSD.

i always assumed the ladies in pajamas didn't want to be stuck in five-inch heels and a push-up bra during a cramped six-hour transcontinental flight.

my friends have always been intelligent and self-aware enough that i've never felt the need to pass out unsolicited advice. i'm pretty sure they can decide for themselves when they want/need a diet without any "helpful" observations from the peanut gallery.

"sea of love" - cat power

@PaintedTrollop: i went to the VMs one valentine's day! it was awesomely awkward for all the male dates.

mrteenwordpower's and my anniversary is actually today, the 13th, so valentine's day tends to get overshadowed. still, i always get him a valentine and a box of those gross-but-iconic candy hearts. this year has been our most gender-normative ever, and he got me a huge box of chocolate caramel almonds.

I have a lot of thoughts. About BMI, corn subsidies, and food deserts. But really, I'm most immediately concerned about the fact that this National Review writer has never met any child, anywhere:

@honeydooo: 4EVER

"still" in my short silk robe (/torn boxers and a t-shirt) at 10am on a saturday? ups guy would be lucky if i made into proper pants by 2.

man, this dude has it so hard that when he got kicked off the football team, the school didn't even send him his own personal cheerleader to celebrate his every sensitive feeling.

i do wish they weren't all wearing the same shoes. heels lengthen the legs and change the alignment of the torso and hips. i'd feel more enlightened (though probably no less dubious) if they were standing flat on their feet.

allowing other people to make the decisions about a person's pregnancy actually = the opposite of choice. good work, Iocco and Riley!

"and in fact, the non-"gifted" kids at my school might have done better if the "gifted" kids had been evenly distributed through their classes."

@BabyJane: plus the witchcraft.

women! know your place! that place being safe in the oddly-harsh arms of CONFORMITY.

i've rarely had my body stared at during any sort of formal interaction, but i know that if i notice i'm being ogled on the street, say, my friendly, smiley, eyes-up self immediately goes into hiding and my eyes hit the ground. i do *not* want to encourage or even address someone making (what appears to me to be) a…

@PhillyLass: you might feel a greater attachment for them emotionally, but i don't think you'd have a greater authority over them legally. if this surrogate felt uncomfortable placing this woman's own children into her care, then notifying the appropriate authorities is exactly what she should have done . this is…

i truly don't understand how the surrogate, of all people, has power over where these children end up. she's not biologically related to them, nor is she the "adoptive" parent. she was paid to gestate existing embryos for someone else. does this mean i can babysit someone's children and then refuse to give them back…