Cut to me asking the Taco Bell drive-thru employee to hand me my burritos individually

Old cars fixed this with a fun little piece of glass/plastic. There are more ornate ones, however this works perfectly.

That last quote: “If he had stopped, he’d be with us today.”

The only place it looks remotely correct, is in a bedside drawer with a bunch of dildos, vibrators and butt plugs.

...bro, trust me, I KNOW what it means to be underwater on a truck.

In fact, police are putting 100 percent of the blame on the driver for his choice to drive away from a police stop

Preferably with a cruise missile.

Fuck Putin

I didn’t realise to Renner ones self was part of the common parlance already. Here for it.

Don’t Renner yourself out there.

Must have been an underinflated tire.

Bro the Ford Sierra decapitating the dummy with the steering wheel

Be careful there, Ferris!

no matter how hard he hunts, he couldnt find the tomato. but once nasa shipped his heinz home, they found it. too bad they accused him so loudly, because his reputation will never ketchup.

Way better than Shitspitter tho

I, for example, gladly have zero offspring. If high numbers of offspring indicate success, then I’m happily failing. Elon, on the other hand, may have more kids (or clones) than anyone knows. A person with no sense of responsibility or “compunction” tends to create more things than one can sustain. We need to measure…

Two Cahs Had A Whicked Crash At The Old Bahsten Mahket

01100100 01110010 01101001 01110110 01100101 00100000 01110011 01110100 01110101 01110000 01101001 01100100 00100000 01110110 01100101 01101000 01101001 01100011 01101100 01100101 01110011 00101100 00100000 01110111 01101001 01101110 00100000 01110011 01110100 01110101 01110000 01101001 01100100 00100000 01110000…

They had to tow it because retail shoppers kept digging around in it for beige trousers and boxy shirts. (You know, because of the Gaps between the panels.)