Cool. Now back to your regularly scheduled program, Turning Kids into Illiterate Shrieking Idiots Who Never Go Outside, Grow Up With Zero Social Skills, and Say “Bro” Incessantly.

He never cashed in? Not sure you know how YouTube works.

Since the majority of self obsessed millennial commenters can’t possibly read something well written and funny online without trying to one-up the author with dozens of “look over here! this is also funny! and you forgot this or that!” replies, I would just like to say thank you Drew. Funny, funny stuff. As is.

Hahaha, only a millennial could twist a core flaw into a benefit.

I miss the days of the internet when the biggest issue was viagra spam.

No worries. It’s just a matter of time ‘til Trump has the FBI on his case for something.

Amazingly, that’s not even her biggest transformation.

“But by focusing on fake problems and even making up problems allows me to not focus on real problems in the world.”

Nothing guarantees a loophole getting closed like a blog post. Good job.

Art to Fart

I’m. 48 year old photo retoucher who lived an extended bachelorhood until marrying my now 36 year old doctor wife 5 years ago. I gave up my Xbox 360 a couple of years before we wed, not out of pressure to stop playing, but more out of being too busy with a new person in my life, who wasn’t a gamer.

With any luck this will be a turning point. There’s a message in this incident...create and foster public obsession over your every move, and there will be consequences.

Damn Apple for leaking the iPhone 30 minutes early and confirming what everyone has already known for the past several months down to the last detail.

Same thing happened the last time I tried to do my stand up comedy routine on the subway...crickets.

A dessert encased in bagel dough is not my idea of delicious, especially when the runoff from the main course has seeped into it.

Aren’t you supposed to build the massive factory AFTER you’re massively successful?

Maybe this will make some people rethink becoming “beauty bloggers”, because I don’t know what this world needs, but I know what it doesn’t need...beauty bloggers.

You can tell yourself it's a vote if you like.

You can tell yourself it's a vote if you like.

Your favorite (favorite, meaning our sponsor) <insert product type> is <insert sponsor name>.

Your favorite (favorite, meaning our sponsor) <insert product type> is <insert sponsor name>.

I will never participate in one of these “tell us your favorite” ad shams again.

I will never participate in one of these “tell us your favorite” ad shams again.