what would happen if everyone at gizmodo took a journalism class at the same time?

This "article" sounds like it was written by my 20 year old stoner neighbor.

The nerve of those computers for not letting people make money automatically!

Justin Haver, former CEO of the now defunct Anchorage Ice Cube Inc. and founder of Space Heater Depot, a short lived chain of stores in Rio de Janeiro...

I could take a dump, put a white doodie icon with a red square background on it, call it Excrement 8, and people would come running. What, pray tell, makes it so "goddamn awesome"?

Ah, the unmistakeable pairing of a fading star (who no one else will sign an endorsement deal with) and a no name brand, each bringing the other down yet another notch.

What happens when the aliens land and they mistake these images as blueprints for intergalactic domination?

Have you ever witnessed how sad/miserable/angry your victims become after discovering their bike is gone? Have you ever considered that without a bike, your victim might be late for, or miss entirely, something more important than you could imagine? Maybe lose their job? Do you consider any of the possible effects…

I would reply to this, but I don't know if my reply will be redundant because I don't have 12 spare hours to figure out this bizarre and unintuitive new comment "system".

Harmony 900 works for me.

this idea was totally stolen from Tumi. I have 3 colors of their "Heathrow" packable sport coat, from 2 years ago, now discontinued. purchased from Bluefly for about $150/ea on sale. They have a sporty soft shoulder (no pads) and a classic cut. They're an amazing travel jacket. fold up small, no wrinkles, and…

Shhhh! Don't tell anyone about the SECRET LADDER! It's a SECRET!

Finally, an axe I can run over with my tractor more than once. I have 3 sheds full of crappy snapped axes, courtesy of my poor tractor driving. I can't believe it can be used by anyone with $30! Are you sure it wasn't created by the craftsmen who created Thor's hammer? It sure seems very Thor-like to me!

ok guys, the weeeed articles have jumped the bong. a gadget site with weed articles is like a cooking show with a bowling contest. we get it; you want to be cool and alternative.

Helvetica doesn't look dated just because it was designed in the 60s. A dentist's chair from the 60s is no comparison. A modern dentist's chair is a product of the changes in our understanding of what a dentist's chair should and can do. Helvetica still serves its purpose perfectly. Seems to me the author can not…

"Acxiom operates on a terrifying scale."

Wow, agree with others, this is apologetic fanboyism at its worst.

wow, not only is it the dumbest idea for a photograph, it's not even what it purports to be. nice incorrect power cord too.

There is a threshhold one crosses from being popular into needing to get a life. 1500 "friends" and 400 twitter feeds is well past that threshhold, as evidenced by this highly egocentric etiquette guide. I seriously wish all this fucking constant twittering/facebooking/texting/checking in/digital masturbation would…