Five rings? Or just four?

No one really cares what cops want to do, they care about what cops actually do.

I’m not 100% sure what this says about me but this is the most heartwarming thing I’ve seen in a long time and this is more heart warming than any and/or all “Service member returns home and surprises children/spouse/dog" videos combined

Buddy Holly and Undone are the two tracks I skip on The Blue Album. Undone because I got sick of hearing it, Buddy Holly because I always hated it. Give me Jonas or The World Has Turned or Surf Wax America any day. Looking at the credits for that album, maybe I like Patrick Wilson?

Hope no hooplehead cocksucker dirt-worshipers get in the way of this.

Eh, I’m of the opinion we shouldn’t be allowed onto any other planets considering what we’ve done to this one.

Yeah. As a neutral observer, I wanted to see the humble fans of New England prevail because they always handle victory with unimaginable class.

Thank you. That’s all I wanted. Ain’t nobody got time for that. 

Valid correction. I will note that the Sinister Removal of Sideburns remains one of DS9s lowkey best ever comedy beats.

This has been the most exciting two games of the Cup Final that I can remember. It’s been fantastic hockey. I hope it goes 7 like this.

I just want to reiterate, fuck the Penguins!

I’d love to make a smartass comment but all I can do is sit here in shock. I can’t believe this team is in the Finals. When we beat the Pens I literally screamed “FUCK YOU, PITTSBURGH” out the window, but this time I’m just in disbelief.

If you’re getting honked at more than once a year you’re probably a really bad driver. I can’t tell you the last time I was legitimately honked at. I honk at someone at least 3 times a week. People suck at driving and need reminded of this at any chance. Honking is strictly for my enjoyment. I couldn’t care less what…

I honk in anger at people who nearly hit me.

This is just like when I recall how many pieces of bread everyone at the table has already had when I’m taking the last one for myself.

I don’t have anything quippy, just glad Deadspin has someone good reporting on hockey

Nah, he left his feet after the point of contact.

Officials failed to call a penalty on the hit, which is obviously weird for a violation of such severity.

You’re kind of looking at the problem the wrong way. Sure, cheaters are the minority in most games, but allowing them to flourish means giving a tiny minority the freedom to ruin the game experience for the majority. Why should I, a paying customer, have to deal with someone being allowed to troll me with methods that…