My parents would have said fine, go hungry.

My father is a malignant narcissist who messes with wait staff (and anyone he thinks he has authority over) for sport. I used to apologize profusely and tip like crazy until one day I realized that I’m an adult and I don’t have to go out to eat with him if I don’t want to...much less speak to him at all. So yep.

I tend to regard them as less “People” and more “Intestinal parasite that has managed to learn to wear clothing and walk upright."

I love how Brad’s customer at Starbucks is given the benefit of the doubt that he has friends.

I could defend being in the position of dealing with a small child who is a picky eater. But that doesn’t mean it’s the restaurant staff’s responsibility to go out of their way to deal with it, too.

The second story reminds me of one of my wife’s tales of waiting tables at Dead Lobster while in grad school.

If I ever have to hand a server extra money because of how much of an asshole you are, I’d not be going to second date, let alone marrying you.

Or he’s just an asshole.

“Dad: “NO! He wants GRILLED CHICKEN. NO LINES. How hard is that to understand?!”

So how many people will crawl out of the woodwork to defend the “no grill lines people,” all of whom should never go out in public and order anything grilled?

No shit, my story would end with "There were no survivors of what came to be called "The Pizza Cutter Massacre."

also what’s wrong w being a ho

“If you’re a bitch, you’re probably not going to like us,” he says. “If you’re a ho, you probably don’t like us. If you’re not a ho or a bitch, don’t be jumping to the defense of these despicable females. Just like I shouldn’t be jumping to the defense of no punks or no cowards or no slimy son of a bitches that’s men.…

IT’S FOR A GOOD CAUSE!

BUT DO THEY STEAL MY ARMPIT HAIRS AND USE THEM FOR SCIENCE EXPERIMENTS AND PROFIT.

Charming

AG Wilson:

Did i do it right?

Here you go buddy. Go nuts