If you're upset about how Zerk killed the dog, consider that it's exactly how King Kong killed the dinosaur in the 1933 movie.

He's not Canada's head of state - he's the head of government. Elizabeth II, through her Governor General, is the head of state. If you're going to talk about another country's politics, it would help to get the basics right.

How have you lived in western Canada for 40 years and not learned yet that Ontario = Canada?

Might as well, if you're not going to use a Snippit. It's there on the fridge - where you are, after getting the milk - and you grab the corner, one motion, clean off. No worries about seams or poking. You can even run with it.
If you're going to use scissors, you might as well use the jawbone of a dead elk. Which…

How could a story of Ontario milk bags not include mention of the Snippit? The highly-specialized tool that sticks to every Ontarian fridge and opens your milk with ease:
https://www.homehardware.ca…