So I must take a side? Fine.

Wait a minute...Trent Dilfer being bad at his job and things still working out because everyone else on the team is good at theirs? Now I’ve heard everything.

I’d love to hear how this ruined Vin Scully for you. Did he make false statements? Is it a good thing that, in a country where people are dying in food riots, the well-to-do are (gasp!) part of the dictatorship? Fuck and no are the correct answers, Junior.

Please, by all means, enlighten us with your worldly views on…

Totally completely agree he's an asshole whole deserves all this vitriol, but we also don’t need to put a photo of his house here right? You’re not doing anything wrong and yes, anyone can find that, but still man, no need.

Don’t really care about this guy but how does that picture show inequality? Is it because you can’t afford his house? Because plenty of non white people can.

No, the vast majority of the world doesn't care about your water cooler gossip. And be honest, the only reason you care is that Bill gets more resources than you do.

Pardon my ignorance, but this condescending non-answer still doesn’t inform me, average internet Joe, why I should give a shit about who’s backing the site.

It's a fabrication about majors. It was a pun, dummy.

Yeah, so this is totally untrue. WWE is now a content engine, and they measure the performance of everything on that network, from which personalities on which shows get views, how long those programs are being watched, and whether clips from RAW and Smackdown featuring Ryback or anyone else are getting shared on…

Nobody pays to see Ryback. I think that’s about as close to a reason as I can muster.

According to Ryback, the Mulkeys should be goddamned billionaires zillionaires.

To be fair, I think Berman is used to saying, “This has never happened before. I swear.”

I’m not sure if this or the post about ethically sourced porn is worse TBH. Those two and the blackmailing of the Geithner guy is probably the holy trinity of awful, though.

Seeing as how there is nothing to be sensitive about, I would assume the latter

Go Redskins!

But we can call them “Washington Football Team” instead! We will make a passive-aggressive point about...Andrew Jackson? Yes! And we totally won’t lose any readers who think the headline is about the Washington Huskies* instead of the Redskins.

Just be smarter and avoid the names all together. My Lions just used the logos because we all know Lions fans can’t read or write and are pretty stupid beyond colors and pictures. I’m also dictating this to my friend to type for me as I cannot read or write. Go Lions

as someone who suffers from gigantism, the New York football team offends me

Goddamn psych majors.

Somewhere, a Salon writer is using this jumpoff for a Thinkpiece about how We Need To Talk About Pizza’s Race Problem