markmarshall
MarkHere.
markmarshall

Nuke it from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.

Hey, my committing a crime (extortion) is OK because you’re committing a morally offensive act. It could be as low-level as harassing women leaving an abortion clinic or as high-level as genocide. Doesn’t matter.

Hacker logic: “I don’t care if you engage in a perfectly legal business enterprise! I am the ultimate digital moral authority and I decide what does and does not qualify as socially acceptable!”

It’s time to try...

“Elphabalowjob”

How to start your day like Mocena:

Sports News Website Reports Sports News; Readers Outraged

Burritos are not wraps. I consulted an expert. (That expert is me.)

Mark, you’re on a roll.

A burrito does not count as a wrap and is excluded.

You’re being conservative. ‘84 here, and my mom would have gotten the needle.

I have no idea how my son has made it to the ripe old age of 16 since there were times in his life when he wasn’t physically touching me or tethered to me with a leash. OMG I’m such a terrible mother.

Hangouts is the worst thing that ever happened to gchat.

Gchat is dead to me after changing the format and creating “hangouts.” I'm old, I don't like change. Furthermore, stay off my lawn.

Remember they days not parking the head of your hard drive was terrifying? Man...i feel so old today.

Left out Millenium, where they send Agents back in time to rescue doomed passengers from planes about to crash. One agent leaves a future device on a plane, that the scientists, of the day, discover; which she then goes back to recover, but fails; creating a "time shock-wave" that wipes out the Millenials' world.

Toddlers and cat in fridge, butter on countertop.

Well, it does work in some other way, because if butter were easier to spread I would probably put it on everything. The butter being hard to spread coupled with my laziness ensures that I will not eat tons of butter. I NEED OBSTACLES I HAVE NO WILL POWER.