marillenbaum
Marillenbaum
marillenbaum

That’s about when I subscribed—I’d just gotten a job after college, and I wasn’t getting paid enough to rock a non-student subscription to a decent paper (it seemed like a decent supplement to NPR). I kept it for about a year, stopped reading during a depressive spell, and ultimately unsubscribed when I went back to

I was just hoping someone would puncture his hand with their heels—all that beautiful force compressed into a single point.

I refuse to accept it! It’s too tragic. I want them to get back together—preferably on a Christmas-themed episode, with falling snow, after frozen hot chocolate milkshakes at Pop’s.

I’d love to meet Jug’s foster parents (who I hope are forwarding him the money they get from social services).

I was so impressed by it! Her use of fashion tape was impeccable.

Chocolate milk celebration warms the cockles of my cold and cynical heart. Yay!

I love this. Oprah makes me so happy. This is a classic church-lady voice, and it makes me so pleased.

I feel like now is the time for another Teddy Roosevelt to go on a trust-busting spree, but without all the weird shit of Teddy Roosevelt.

I’m choosing to live in hope, dammit!

Right? She may not be dead, but her career sure as fuck is.

How do you have people over for FOUR HOURS and not provide any food? Is this college? No, because even in college you get the resident sober person (me) to drive everyone to Cook-Out for 3 AM milkshakes and fried chicken.

My mother grew up in Boston, and I still remember her waxing rhapsodic about how their house had a butler’s pantry that is the size of my current kitchen. Of course, she had literally a dozen siblings, so they needed the space, but still!

THIS. My sister played flute when we were growing up, and even though she was a fairly talented musician, it was nice to have space where I couldn’t hear her (we shared a room).

Hi, let’s be friends. I yearn for a proper dining room. We had one when I was a kid, and we ate there every night. The kitchen table was for breakfast and homework and prep space for making dinner.

I love this! Your mom sounds fabulous as heck. Any chance she could help me decorate my apartment?

I am a sucker for tubs. My dream is a claw-foot tub of my very own. I take baths most nights because I find them so much more restful than a shower, which is basically only for when I need to wash my hair/went to the gym.

That upper photo is literally my dream apartment. I need it!

I feel you! My mom was the tenth of thirteen kids, and were simply turned outside until dinner time. Even growing up with just me and my sister, my mother wasn’t one for constant watching—we would play outside, or in our room, and that was pretty much fine.

No, because my older sister was sneaky and managed to avoid all kitchen chores, so they became my job. Upside is, now we’re adults and I’m easily the more talented cook, so I’ll use it as a chance to feel smug, even if she is taller than me.

That was my grandparents and separate bedrooms—they loved each other dearly, but Farmor was a light sleeper and Farfar snored like a lumber mill.