No, there’s a zero chance of divorce. I’m sure he’s got an ironclad pre-nup that guarantees her nothing. She sold her soul for that lifestyle.

Honestly, it probably won’t matter since whatever assets he has are gonna be divided between The Feds, The State of New York, and the Deutsche Bank.  

/read entirely as Jon Lovitz

Jill Biden, who likely will be supervising their move, needs to have the entire White House Fogged down, UV sanitized, and scrubbed clean of orange bronzer, falling orangutan like hair all over the carpet and clogging the shower, Melania’s leg make-up on all the good furniture and Barron Trump’s stiff white socks.…

This same source says Trump doesn’t have a “concession speech ready and [has] no intention of recognizing Joe Biden’s presidency,” even by attending his inauguration, and that Melania and Barron have “stayed in their private quarters” throughout the stinky hamburger conferences.

I got a mail box on the new number but I let them know that I saw a “non white woman” who could have been AOC raising the dead in a Michigan cemetery and all the zombies marching to the polls saying “Biden 2020"

“Keep spamming. We will keep changing the number.”

Some random tweet also mentioned this convergence and pointed out that it was the perfect place for them to go fuck themselves and die.

Interesting. Cos we definitely showed up and showed out yesterday. From chants to live instruments to cars blasting “FDT” by YG & Nipsey Hussle. Downtown Philly would’ve been an embarrassment for them. Somehow I think this was a fortunate mistake for them borne of utter incompetence.

Between a porn shop and a crematorium. Absolutely perfect.

The other theory I heard was that they wanted to book a place that sounded legit without being in downtown Philly where the crowds would have shouted them down.

The real funny part about this? The Four Seasons Landscaping place is next to a porn shop. Now you know Rudy went in there and grabbed some shit for him to jack to later. The next Trump campaign press conference will be at World O’ Booty on Market St in Philadelphia at 1:00pm today. Geno’s will be providing the…

Don’t disrespect K-Mart like that. They are actually useful and you can get stuff there that can help you.

What the hell is this ghetto ass shit??

*huge manatee

FUCK YEAH! USA! USA! USA!

I don’t know even know if it’s a matter of self-awareness at all? It’s just what the right (or fascism, in particular) does: outwardly co-opt the discourse and practice of the left. That’s what the Nazis did; that’s what the alt-right does by turning the discourse around safe spaces into the interminably unhelpful…

I mean at least it’s not as bad as the drummer of System of a Down being a Trump supporter. Like did you not pay attention to what Serj was singing about?

Trumpers have the self-awareness of an old farting dog smelling its own ass, and this is just the millionth example of it.

I believe fellow 90s musician Kurt Cobain summed this type of situation up well.