This is the same franchise with the same director who marketed his misguided WoK remake on the premise that Cumberbatch was DEFINITELY ASSUREDLY 100% NO WAY IN HELL KHAN so he could “reveal” him as Khan despite everyone already knowing it from the very first bit of advertising.

See, when one man loves another man very, very much, and that other man likes the first man just enough to be a bro . . .

Is there a fan club for otherwise straight men who would really like to lay their head on Chris Hemsworth’s shoulders while caressing his abs? Wondering where I need to send my membership fee.

It’s like half these titles are being written by really bad One Word At A Time players

Yes, it really is that much worse. The net negativity of sugary beverages is due to their overuse, not an inherent quality of their existence.

^

Or gold coins

If you’re trying to imply what it looks like you’re trying to imply, that doesn’t work.

It’s like Her but if Scarlett Johansson were a pyramid scheme

Are you suggesting that those zeroes . . . have no value?

You should have explained to them that “banks” are basically crypto wallets for actual money.

“Our thing is so much better than dollars! So much better, in fact, that we still continuously refer to the dollar value of our thing but that’s just to make fun of how bad dollars are!”

Yeah, but you don’t ever get to recognize how happy or unhappy you are after you die. That last moment of consciousness: pretty big.

To corroborate the many, many stories of “Keanu Reeves is a nice dude” floating around, he has legitimately used his own career clout to further the careers of a number of other people. Keanu funnels stunt people to director’s chairs the way Alabama funnels high schoolers to the NFL.

“Can an actor be paid for tickets that “would have been” sold if something bad hadn’t happened?”

“industry-standard practices, include a meeting with the people who’d be rigging him up for wire work to talk over the stunt, were skipped”

Starring WWE superstar Drew McIntyre, in the long-standing tradition of wrestlers playing Special Forces-trained babysitters.

That menu made Kyle Kinane’s gout flare up

I think this is a useful metaphor:

It doesn’t look like they’re claiming that the photographer didn’t get spit on.