Do people on Jalopnik regularly skip the articles? Read the damn thing.

“But the question remains how Potter was there for so very long without being found.”

Suicide prevention hotline:

They’d just check your dental records and your Belize retirement would come to a grinding halt.

With the “security guards” license plate reader, if there isn’t a clear plate, it won’t read it. Being as he was from Kansas, they only have plates on the back. He had backed into the parking spot, up against the wall. The “guards” never bothered to get out and check the plate. Had they done their job, he would have…

You have to be French to own a French car now? You need to speak that language to own a car? I ask because I didn’t get the memo, and I don’t speak any Japanese.

My wife is French and agrees with you. She loves German cars.

FCA and Land Rover just high fived each other and anxiously await the day they’re not at the bottom of the reliability list......

Acting like adults is arbitrary, you’re just a bigger kid with more money and a little more knowledge. I don’t really have any morals or respect for things just because I’m told I should. If I can lie/cheat my way out of something and get away with it, I’ll take that 10/10 times. When asked how do I sleep at night,…

nobody wrenching in my street.... pretty sure the neighbour is growing pot in his shed tho

Leave me out of this.

That’s why they ask Jesus to take the wheel

They just did what good Christians are supposed to do - having been slapped on one side, they turned the van around to expose the other side for slapping. I imagine there are many mirrorless but righteous church vans out there

Wow the back end must’ve been scrapping

Surprisingly, it really wasn’t that low. But, you did know the weight was there driving it.

A boat.

I managed to get Mr. Vasquez’s mugshot

Finally, America has essentially become the GTA parody of itself.

I rented a Pontiac Sunfire for a trip to Kill Devil Hills, NC - a place where driving on the beach is completely allowed. After the usual assortment of handbrake-assisted U-turns and curb clips, we headed out around midnight to drift the sandy shores. We made it, maybe, 100 feet before becoming impossibly stuck. By…

Just doing your jalop duty. Killing off Focus Sedans.