I blame absolutely everyone involved in the fiasco and think they’re all irresponsible shitrags whose opinions I don’t respect.

I sure as shit wouldn’t support him running for president, either. 

If her principles don’t include due process, then she should not be in a position of governmental authority.

And if she’d said she could jam her fingers into the pussy of any woman she wants to, any time she wants to, she could be president.

Did you not notice Netanyahu sucking Hitler’s cock?

“For more than 40 years this country has operated under the policy that not one cent of tax-payer money can be used to fund abortion,” he added.

I’d like to request that no churches be allowed as polling places if they support the known terrorist group known as the Pro-Life movement. 

When my first sugar glider died, I legit considered having him freeze-dried and using him as a paperweight.

I just watched the most recent season, and was surprised and pleased to see Ricky Jay in it. It still feels to me like he only just died, and his appearances in Sneaky Pete were like seeing a wonderful, charming, snarky ghost.

To be fair, it’s likely that all the women he knows are conservative Christians, so his entire sample size is consciencelss morons.

Okay, I cried a little - but it’s still kind of funny to feature a guy named Samson in a shaving ad.

Unless your friend is pro-life.

The In Living Color “Black or White” also kicked some ass.

Holy goddamned shit. I immediately want to subscribe to this woman’s newsletter. 

I mean, I understand where they’re coming from. You can’t really “rape” a pro-life woman; instead, you “offer her a chance to participate in motherhood.” Anything she says indicating that she feels she’s been “raped” is just indicative of her failure to be properly grateful for the chance she’s been given. 

Every time I see and hear her, I think of Victoria Jackson.

I have to say, the only real bright spot I see in all this is that pro-life women will at least suffer along with their smarter counterparts. Prosecute each and every pregnant pro-life woman for smoking, drinking, eating soft cheese or fish. Take them to court and charge them to the fullest extent of the law for…

Next incarnation of Shirley Q Liquor:

I don’t know who that actress is, but holy shit she’s a great terrifying menace.

Jesus Christ. I’m having a nightmare move right now, but nothing compares to Max’s.