We had an art-class bully in high school who used to just torment everyone, including the teacher... one day, after he'd thrown my pencil set to the floor for the umpteenth time (really, dude?), wonderful little Ms. Vernam, who was in the middle of helping somebody squeegee oil-based ink through a silkscreen at the…

Can we also put an end to hovering and peeing all over the fucking toilet seat in public ladies rooms? There is nothing worse than walking into a public restroom to find someone else's piss all over the damn seat. You cannot get fucking herpes or AIDS or whatever it is you're afraid of from plopping your ass on the…

I was really struck by this article that this couple could possibly survive if they had enough money to leave the country....or maybe enough money to buy off the girls' family (possibly?). I know journalists are supposed to stay objective and not interfere in the lives of the people they write about, but at some…

Ha! Now, I'll also forever think of her that way, too.

"I really would like to know the name of the person who actually wrote this."

Ha! Yes! About five times. I'm anxiously awaiting the next book (this month I think?). That's exactly the kind of series I love.

Same. As a minimalist, I love things to be simple and "basic."

Then, I watched the video (hilarious), and I discovered that I am not basic. And the inner high schooler in me got excited that I was not uncool.

"That's my worst nightmare, I cheated on my wife,"

Argh. This has been so blown out of proportion and context. This guy was the one who introduced the bill to legalize interracial marriage in Alabama.

I'm pretty sure my status as An Old has been cemented, and if it hasn't, it will be now. Spring Break '93 and my friends and I decide to fly out and crash at my roommate's brother's apartment in West Hollywood. Well, one of my friends' boyfriends was a big tattoo guy, and he wanted a t-shirt from Sunset Strip Tattoos,…

That sounds like the rural deep South all right! (Says someone who grew up in a oxbow lake between Macon and Atlanta.)

These will never beat KFC's Double Down for the title of World's Most Horrifyingly Disgusting Sandwich of Doom. Never! I mean, it uses (fried) CHICKEN as BREAD.

This is one of my best serving stories in my eight years serving and bartending, because it resulted in legal action.

Tracy reminds me of Joan Armatrading. Anyone else remember her?

I always wrote Dawson's Creek off as nonsense and JVDB as a random over emotive floppy haired 90s dude, but seriously he grew up to be fantastic. He was so on point playing himself in Don't Trust the B it was ridiculous.

Madonna has been... weird lately, rather than eccentric or controversial or whatevs, but eternal fondness for that pic. Fuck shaving armpits in this never-ending winter. How else are we supposed to stay warm?

As a long term reader of Jezebel, a below the liner, and a member of the technical crew of Midnight Rider, fuck you and your headline.

OH YAY MORE KID ADVICE FROM SOMEONE WITH NO KIDS.