I don't know, I think this dress would be perfectly pretty in literally ANY other color. If it were black, she'd look fantastic. This awful green just makes it look like she has lichens growing all over her.

Oooh. Just finished The Heavens Rise by Christopher Rice, and Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls by Dave Sedaris. The Sedaris was awesome, as always, but the Rice was a little....eh. Fans of his other books might find it a little disappointing.

It's okay. She's dumb. She might be a perfectly nice person, but odds are she's just not that bright. Avoid her as much as you can, and when you have to interact with her, smile and say something about nail polish.

Alright, my experiences at the museums and galleries in Italy has taught me that the really valuable, important sculpture is kept carefully guarded. The base of this thing is tagged with graffiti, for pete's sake. I'm gonna go ahead and call this one as not being that big of a deal. That's not to say that the…

I will freely admit that my assumptions with regard to lunch have caused problems at every job I've ever had.

They sort of are- you can't enroll a kid in school without presenting immunization records. Unfortunately there are many, many loopholes that anti-vaxxers can exploit to get around this.

Somewhere, Stephen breathes a sigh of relief.

Oh god, I cannot WAIT for Only Lovers Left Alive!! Swinton AND Hiddleston?? TOO MUCH. IT'S ALL TOO MUCH.

I gotta say, Katie Holmes will always be my number 1 girl crush. I love her style, AND she's from Ohio. JOEY POTTER 4EVER!

Exactly. I see so many people blathering the 'oh but she's 18 which means she's an adult' argument, which is ludicrous. 18, let's face it, is an utterly arbitrary age when it comes to whether or not someone is actually an adult. Legally, they may be considered so, but mentally and emotionally? No fucking way. It's not…

Alright, I have no doubt in my mind that this girl is spoiled beyond spoiled and probably sucks. She's probably an entitled brat. BUT. But. I also think her parents are probably major assholes. None of the people in this situation look good. Did they kick her out, or did she leave voluntarily? If they kicked her out,…

Fucking seriously!! I grew an inch my freshman year of college, and didn't get boobs until I was like 21. God only know what I'd look like now if I'd gotten plastic surgery at 17.

Oh man, this is the first time I've seen a picture of her. She's terrifying. She's got that mean second grade teacher who'll smack you with a ruler thing going on. I feel sorry for whoever her son DOES end up marrying. I'm sure it'll be just wooooonderful having her for a mother-in-law.

Fuck you, thurston. You cheated on KIM GORDON. KIM FUCKING GORDON YOU BLEW IT. YOU LOSE. YOU FAIL AND YOU LOSE.

My eyes are two very different prescriptions as well- I'm extremely nearsighted in one and a tiny bit farsighted in the other, not even enough to really need a lens. You best believe I'll be rocking a monocle.

Honestly, the commentariat at xojane is a clusterfuck of people trying to one-up each other with stories of various traumas. I wouldn't believe a single thing I read anywhere over there.

That color tho

FFS, my husband's grandmother makes her lasagna with cottage cheese!! I thought she was a goddamn lunatic, but apparently this is a thing?

I'm convinced now, more than ever, that the only reason any members of my family made it through the 50s unscathed is because my grandmother is Spanish and will only eat or cook food of Mediterranean origin. Thank god.

YES WE CAN FANGIRL!! I looked for a copy for years before amazon was even really a thing (or at least a thing it would have occurred to me to use) and when I stumbled upon one in a secondhand bookstore I was freaking ecstatic. It's just such an amazing book. We need to spread the gospel of The Basic Eight.