Welcome to the Land Down Under.

I'll give up my SkyMall magazine when you pry it from my cold ... oh wait, that doesn't sound right.

I find it fascinating in Sweden, "parents are entitled to 480 days of parental leave when a child is born or adopted. This leave can be taken by the month, week, day or even by the hour. Women still take most of the days – in 2012, men took about 24 per cent of parental leave.

For 390 days, the maximum parental…

Thomas Kemper Root Beer.

Aaargh matey, this is Keith Richards.

Sorry Mr Mayer, this is Keith Richards.

This must give the military pause differentiating between protestors and possible rifle laser scopes or laser guided missiles.

I like Zoi Greek yogurt with a spoonful of whatever jam is in the 'fridge or with a squeeze of honey. Epic tast, fit for the gods.

If you're eating caviar with a metal spoon, you're doing it wrong - metal may impart an undesirable flavour. I know, first world problem.

You gotta have yellow leather balls to juggle around Iceland.

"Well Strauss is the hooker, I thought we were allowed a little squeeze."

"United announced that starting next year for qualification for 2015 MileagePlus elite levels, frequent fliers will have to spend at least 10 cents for every mile required for different elite levels. Delta announced similar requirements in January. Silver status at United, for example, requires 25,000 miles flown in a…

Reading that "Ryan Seacrest is a man (asexual? with a starfish-like reproductive system?) on the prowl" reminded me of Kurt Vonnegut's "Breakfast of Champions".

If the music during the closing credits is 'Don't Stop Believing' I'm storming to the box office to demand my money back.

Not necessarily a good photo to post in your cubicle.

I love the Mach3. As my five o'clock shadow is noticeable after about five days it takes ages for a blade replacement.

How about the mark up for the Ciroq vodka, from about $25 a bottle to $450.

His initials are W.A.D.; need I say more?

Or wear flip flops when invited by the President to the White House like the members of the Northwestern University championship women's lacrosse team.

Which harkens back to those who rushed to the Spanish Civil War (1936-1939) such as Arthur Koestler, Ernest Hemingway and his lover Martha Gellhorn, Pablo Picasso, George Orwell, Esmond Romilly, Salvador Dali, and the poet Federico Lorca (who was killed).