Many years ago, I taught at a small boarding school. One of my students—I’ll call him “James”—was in sixth grade, and he was a difficult, petulant young man.

This is about my twin sister. First day of school, she was in second grade. A boy named Ricky started picking on her. Pulling at her hair, slapping, kicking and terrorizing her. She was scared but nobody did anything. The teacher just told Ricky to stop it but he continued. He was big and an asshole. He grabbed her…

So, when I was in kindergarten, I wasn’t allowed to carry an umbrella on the bus.

I had this happen when I volunteered at my daughter’s school for picture day. I was no-makeup, hair in a bun, baggy sweatshirt, and 33 goddamn years old. A teacher came up to me and said “Whose class are you in, sweetie?”

I used to teach elementary art in a really low-income school district near Denver. One student, Franklin, was a third-grader who was homeless and living in a car with his mother at the time. The district and social services were aware and helping as much as possible, but mom was hard to work with due to some ongoing…

I have always had a baby face. At 27, I look like I’m a teenager, and I’m pretty sure I’ll be carded well into my thirties.

Man, I was sure the sex worker one would be a winner!

My first day of my senior year of college, some girl stopped me in the bookstore and asked if she could take a picture of me for some college fashion blog

you’re god damn right you can take a picture of me for your fashion blog

YOU KNOW I GET PAID FOR THIS RIGHT?