Woody probably has R Kelly’s jail on speed dial, asking for advice on how to handle the post-doc aftermath.

So your main takeaway from her post is that she writes funny, not that there was some (at the least) creepy shit going on that they had to make a rule like that in the first place? She was like 14 years old.

“Nowhere in the rules does it specifically say that a dog can’t play basketball.”

Gorilla Glue doesn’t specifically warn against hair usage.

Good.  I’ve been waiting for this news since we saw the original story.  And the NYPD can’t locate her- but she spoke to CNN??   Clock’s ticking, hopefully.

I wouldn't mind stocking up on some Twisted Tea...

“After she agreed to provide evidence that could help confirm her claim that she was assaulted, she stopped responding to CNN’s phone calls and text messages.”

I don’t like to see people lose their jobs in this pandemic, but-

It always seems like the logical is too much for these crazy ass Karens. Putting her hands on someone’s child? As a woman, I would have slapped her to sleep.

And the manager fired. 

Figures. A Karen falsely accuses and even assaults a child, and when proven wrong, just walks away instead of apologizing profusely like she should have. I hope that white cow gets found out and dragged all over social media.

A lot of things get tweeted every day, so I’m sure I just missed the one that said “This is infuriating. Tamir was a 12 year old boy who left his house to play outside at the playground . . . murdered by cops in seconds?!”

“She cries. She wants to come home.”

Well do you have flag?

she didn’t just identify as a transvestite, she was an executive transvestite.

I’ve been a huge fan of Eddie since I was like 12 years old and was first introduced to the “Church of England, Cake or Death” bit. Kind of nice that Eddie is a gender neutral name (as all names should be, honestly). I noticed a bit of dancing around it here, referring to her only as “Izzard.”  Has there been a given…

Now let’s hear your dating dos and don’ts!

LOTS OF PLANETS HAVE A WALES! 

Its good to see that the Empire is willing to hire Southern a-holes to be officers when they are on hard times instead of just the British ones.